Miscellaneous: Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into...

By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 23:26 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 861

You deserved it 5 351

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Same thing different taste

The art, the artist

By waltzy777 - 26/04/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 612

You deserved it 83 051

By Anonymous - 17/08/2013 10:52 - United States

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 147

You deserved it 7 988

By Anonymous - 13/09/2017 08:00 - Canada - Grand Bay

Today, I thought it would be funny to mow a dick into my grandmother's lawn, but the mower leaked gasoline and now there's a giant dead grass outline. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 4 628

By overthehorizon - 27/07/2009 17:25 - United States

Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire 2 acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 549

You deserved it 4 207

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 20:50 - United States

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 031

You deserved it 4 416

By What. - 14/08/2013 00:08 - United States - Pawtucket

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 071

You deserved it 3 568

By Anonymous - 13/11/2011 08:40 - Canada

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 944

You deserved it 2 502

Eye bleach

By deardaughter - 14/08/2019 06:00 - Australia

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 802

You deserved it 120

By Anonymous - 10/07/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 345

You deserved it 15 864

Not now, Sweetie

By Redbeard - 24/01/2020 05:00

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 368

zingline89 18

Wednesday 26 June 2013 9:35

Oh no, he remembered alright

Mech1989 13

Wednesday 26 June 2013 9:35

That is insanely funny. Hopefully your parents are pretty easy going.

Comments

Joe9024 20

Wednesday 26 June 2013 10:36

I bet he would've rather been stuffing his penis in your lawn, only if the bush was trimmed though.

writergirl23 19

Wednesday 26 June 2013 10:42

Time to get that mower out quick!

jenaayy 7

Wednesday 26 June 2013 11:19

Hopefully they don't take it wrong.. I'd say thats pretty cool

cottoncandymango 17

Wednesday 26 June 2013 11:39

It is funny though...

emuexport 4

Wednesday 26 June 2013 11:43

Excellent, penis art is ALWAYS hilarious!, hopefully it will show up on the local aerial photo service

debeurre123 10

Wednesday 26 June 2013 11:53

Or he remembered!

MaxPlain69 8

Wednesday 26 June 2013 12:22

Your husband is a penis...

Frenchtony 17

Wednesday 26 June 2013 12:40

Blame it on UFOs !

tenac71 6

Wednesday 26 June 2013 12:55

Oh I doubt he forgot

vegeta77 4

Wednesday 26 June 2013 15:50

Yeah, just a sign that the dicks are coming.

badgirl00069 19

Wednesday 26 June 2013 13:34

Lmao

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Health Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 835

You deserved it 6 059

Today, my longtime crush, who turned me down because he’s “sick of women”, just got into a relationship. He made it Facebook official, with photos of them and everything. Wanting to even the score, I commented, “So it seems your sickness of women is cured, huh?” He bitched at me for “ruining his moment” and deleted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 1 050

The Top

Today, I tried to find a job. Again. It's been seven years since I earned more than 70€ in a month, seven years since I moved back in with my parents, and seven years since I was registered as having a medical disability. Nobody wants me, not even as a shelf stacker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 125

Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 457

You deserved it 2 676

Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for various people; 17 to be exact. It wasn't until I placed the last present on top of the stack that I realized I didn't put gift tags on any of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 034

You deserved it 40 788

Today, I came home from a four-day trip. Apparently, my cat thought I was gone for good and is now very unhappy that I'm home. I know this because she's been positioning herself between me and my husband all night, and hisses every time I try to touch him. He thinks it's hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 340

You deserved it 5 157

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 178

You deserved it 10 071

Today, my mother-in-law told my husband that I cannot stay in her house unless I can bring proof from a doctor that my allergy to cats is not contagious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 528

You deserved it 2 533

Same thing different taste

The art, the artist

Eye bleach

Not now, Sweetie

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