Miscellaneous: Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a...

By FML - 15/07/2009 14:29 - Syrian Arab Republic

Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 669

You deserved it 5 309

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Sprinkler

By shelly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 961

You deserved it 7 575

By ItWasOurAnniversary - 28/09/2016 12:08 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 407

You deserved it 2 502

By Anonymous - 21/02/2014 09:59 - Russian Federation - Lipetsk

Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 970

You deserved it 4 117

By Kay - 03/02/2011 05:33

Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 817

You deserved it 3 168

Oh, hello there, don't mind me

By downinthedumps - 13/01/2015 02:47 - United States - Detroit

Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 998

You deserved it 3 341

That's… a crime?

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 05:01 - Canada

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that I see a therapist every week because, amongst other things, I'm terrified of being locked in a room. He didn't believe me, so he locked me in the bathroom "for a laugh." I had a panic attack and passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 765

You deserved it 141

By ihasnoafroanymore - 10/06/2019 12:05

Today, I was working at my job at a McDonald's. I was on my break, so I went to use the restroom. When I finished, I tried to open the door, but the lock broke. I was stuck in the basement bathroom for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 736

You deserved it 170

By killmenow - 23/04/2014 14:54 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 832

You deserved it 14 407

Sitcom vibes

By Anonymous - 16/11/2013 19:31 - France - Paris

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 401

You deserved it 48 871

Who are you?

By NotlovingAgain - 14/03/2022 06:00

Today, knowing my long-distance boyfriend was cheating on me with a local girl, I decided to make a surprise visit to confront him by showing up to his home. Both of them answered the door. My boyfriend claimed to not know me, and threatened to call the cops. I ended up back at the airport in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 632

You deserved it 460

Rockyio 0

Wednesday 15 July 2009 20:11

since when do u need a key for a cafe toilet? do they serve gasoline too? lol

bloodfalcon22 0

Wednesday 15 July 2009 21:01

Did you lock yourself in the bathroom? or the toilet?

Comments

malcolm1919 0

Wednesday 15 July 2009 23:46

YDI for having a long distance boyfriend. Tool.

patrickhb 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 0:02

What's wrong with long distance? You don't know the circumstances, bet they shouldn't matter anyway. Tool.

drinkupgorgeous 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 0:07

And your long-distance boyfriend coming to visit is relevant because...?

whizzkidd99 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:09

well obviously your a dumb ******* sand ****** cuz you are from the middle east, so you dont evem deserve to live

pineapples_fml 5

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:21

are you really that stupid?! it doesn't matter where the hell you're from, all people deserve to live except for close-minded dumbasses like you. you are a complete idiot for using stereotypes to make all your assumptions about people.. it's not like anyone can control in any way what family they are born into or where they are from. I hope you burn in a fire along with all your ignorant intolerance

ssyyyykke 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:43

@ #42 shut the hell up vanilla face

whizzkidd99 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 4:12

oooo good one if anything that is a compliment you dumbass

whizzkidd99 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:14

ps. its called a bathroom not a toilet i hate sand monkeys they are ******* stupid

pineapples_fml 5

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:23

go die

ssyyyykke 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 2:39

woohoooo go syrians!!

Shyman4ever 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 5:54

How do people even manage to break keys like that?

beccajunebug 0

Thursday 16 July 2009 15:29

i got stuck in a wendys bathroom when i was little and it was on vacation so i was freaking out i was the only one in the bathroom and the restaurannt wasnt that crowded and so i tried to get the door open for about 5 minutes then gave up and started screaming help about 5 more minutes later some guy just comes and opens the door right up and i had mascara running down my face and when i got back to the table my parents were laughing at me and they were like oh we shouldve come to check on you.I realized that the store had gotten really crowded and i was really embarassed then about a week later i got stuck in another bathroom that was in the back of the store where no one could hear me so i tried once to open the door and i couldnt and so i was tired of trying to get out of bathrooms so i sat there for a while and started to get worried i tried to open it another way and it opened the bad part is both times it was in public.