Miscellaneous: Today, my mom thought I was flying high on weed and nearly grounded...

By HappyMan - 03/08/2012 02:14 - United States - Corpus Christi

Today, my mom thought I was flying high on weed and nearly grounded me for it. I wasn't high, I was just actually in a good mood for the first time in a few weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 134

You deserved it 2 322

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Same thing different taste

Royal highness

By Anonymous - 19/10/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, unlike what you may have joked about with your friends, I actually did meet people who told me to "take a hit or we'll beat the shit out of you." I got picked up by my mom 20 minutes later like planned. When my mom noticed I was high, she grounded me for the "rest of high school." FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 396

By valarmorgoolies - 06/02/2015 18:51 - United States - Binghamton

Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 828

You deserved it 3 036

By lehonX9 - 06/06/2015 09:11 - Germany - Hanover

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 814

You deserved it 9 724

Placebo

By mother teresa was a cunt - 17/09/2015 14:54 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 524

You deserved it 5 459

By Anonymous - 22/04/2015 13:39 - United States - Columbus

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 816

You deserved it 6 065

Check yourself

By Anonymous - 28/10/2014 23:54 - United States

Today, my mom talked to me and my brother about how great it was that our cousin was getting away from drugs and becoming sober, as he would have so many more opportunities opened up for him now. She explained all this while sitting on our patio, smoking a blunt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 522

You deserved it 3 870

By Anonymous - 28/09/2013 21:28 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, in a fit of jealousy over my recent muscle growth, my brother told our mom that I've only been going to the gym so I could smoke weed with my friends. She believed him and grounded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 665

You deserved it 2 955

Stoner

By Alyssa - 13/02/2012 00:01 - United States

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 849

You deserved it 83 226

By Anonymous - 18/10/2014 18:33 - United States

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because, "Nobody's that happy without drugs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 958

You deserved it 3 068

By hypercrite dad - 19/09/2014 18:34 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 145

You deserved it 15 542

mrghdfy76 8

Friday 3 August 2012 9:13

IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE WOAAAAHOHOH

OfficialJSmooth 8

Friday 3 August 2012 9:16

Flying high... Grounded... See what he did there?

Comments

medenbm 8

Friday 3 August 2012 15:33

Happens to me too and i haven't touched drugs in my life.

kimg0885 23

Friday 3 August 2012 15:47

Are you sure it was just weed?

hillorie 14

Friday 3 August 2012 16:24

Dude. That sucks:/

WithinEPICA 4

Friday 3 August 2012 17:10

parents should get awards for being assholes

ilovekaedyn 0

Friday 3 August 2012 17:57

Bet if you stated smoking pot you'd be happier more often :)

jillydiane132 4

Friday 3 August 2012 19:03

Drug test?

lexiieeex3 32

Friday 3 August 2012 19:54

"Nearly" grounded you... Not so bad. You didn't even get grounded. Hardly an FML.

PJmeloche 2

Friday 3 August 2012 19:56

Flying high on weed? Ever even smoked.

hftg 0

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:17

Obviously not that's y he put it nd I doubt you have either

xleanne_aLly 23

Tuesday 7 August 2012 14:05

Actually he probably has, you'd really be surprised how many do. Over 70% of the people I know (family included) smoke weed.

SpearD 4

Friday 3 August 2012 20:06

Wow, way to ruin a good day.

PhishloverA 14

Friday 3 August 2012 21:04

That would suck, getting grounded for being in a good mood

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The Top

Today, I took my new boyfriend's virginity about 10 minutes ago. He kept whispering, "It’s inside you, it’s actually inside you… feels kind of sticky, slippery, it’s actually inside you I can’t believe it.” It was super off-putting and a bit creepy. And no, I definitely did not orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 277

Today, I found a picture on my phone of me and my best friend that I didn't take. Turns out my dad did, from behind, and it got onto my Google photo backup, which means that he was logged in to my Gmail from his phone when he did it. And my family wonders why I don't trust them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 124

The Top

Today, I found out I was passed over for the promotion I've wanted for 9 months at the fast food restaurant I work in. Who got the job? The 16 year old girl I trained 2 weeks ago. Their excuse was, "She has ambition." I'm going to college for food service management. She failed her drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 605

You deserved it 4 240

Today, my boss found out I had applied for a much better paying job. He told me I'd do a better job and make more money there. Then he fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 669

You deserved it 2 335

Today, I ran into a guy who I was completely in love with for months. After a couple of minutes, I realised he totally bores me senseless. What a waste of 4 months obsessing over that shithead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 745

You deserved it 64 891

Today, as usual during sex, my boyfriend finished first, and then he "massaged" me so I could finish too. While he was doing that, his grandma called. He actually answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 179

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 718

You deserved it 13 270

Today, I missed my bus. But it didn't miss me. I've been in the hospital for 8 hours with a broken leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 883

You deserved it 2 291