Sex, Farts and Intimacy: Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking...

FML for mobile
Free

By Sadman - 23/04/2011 08:37 - Canada

Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthy conversation, my girlfriend mentioned, "And he always farts during sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 223

You deserved it 10 820

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Rush of gas

By Fart queen - 05/12/2022 04:00

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heard to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 725

By Madi - 30/11/2011 17:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 756

You deserved it 3 629

By Anonymous - 11/09/2012 19:16 - Sweden - Guayanilla

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 337

You deserved it 4 385

By screamer - 02/09/2012 06:41 - United States - Paso Robles

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 959

You deserved it 38 523

Great handle!

By I'll Make You FartCum - 02/01/2015 21:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 461

You deserved it 9 141

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 325

You deserved it 5 077

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 23/11/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, my hubby thought he made me queef during sex. I was too embarrassed ro tell him it was a fart I was holding in, but couldn’t once I orgsmed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 177

By mandygeegoesnom - 29/02/2012 05:30 - United States

Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 156

You deserved it 2 538

That homely smell

By Bottomless_Pit_for_the_NOMS - 23/09/2020 10:01 - United States - Miami

Today, my mother had just got home and we were both in the kitchen. She then starts to get out food and I smelled deviled eggs. Delighted, I asked, "Do I smell deviled eggs?" She turned around laughing and announced she'd farted. I effectively got hungry from my mother’s fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 384

You deserved it 369

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 318

You deserved it 3 867

GigaPudding_fml 24

Saturday 23 April 2011 15:56

"Yeah, his father does that too!"

Lopee069 4

Saturday 23 April 2011 15:56

Then stop farting

Comments

calvin10 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 20:21

YDI for farting during sex!!!! disgusting!

jdcostal 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 20:29

that stinks

babycakess10 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 21:26

that's both awkward that she told your mother that and awkward that you fart during sex.

underpaid011 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 21:32

get even. next time you are in bed give a dutch oven.

gotbiscuits 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 21:52

You were unaware of this fact, huh?

zeta24 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 22:20

94 totally agree

Alekyork 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 22:33

@shoopd....u made my day.

drethereason 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 22:44

TMI!

Crazy4Christ 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 22:46

maybe you shunt have sex

johnjohnfries 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 1:49

wow man queef queef much

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Facebook Family Death Embarrassing Relatable Teenagers Football Clothes Disappointment Parents Education Religion Love Tinder Anger Jealousy Skincare Sex Vacation TV shows Periods Health Cute Kids Weird Job interview Work Abuse Gross

The Top

Today, I tried to make it right by visiting my girl in the hospital after she had our baby. I fucked up by freaking out and dumping her since I didn’t feel ready, but now wanted to do the right thing. When I got there, another guy was kissing her and holding my baby. My best friend/cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 1 040

Today, I attempted to give a motivational speech to my kids, trying to inspire them with life lessons. They then asked me why I couldn't "do a cartwheel like all the other parents" and challenged me to try. Now my back hurts, and I’m questioning my life choices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 258

The Top

Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some Lean Pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 208

You deserved it 41 003

Today, a bee flew into my car, I panicked, swerved off the road, and hit a mailbox. It was a metal keg filled with cement buried in the ground. Taking my father's advice, I fled the scene. Later, my mailman knocked on my door holding part of my bumper. He said, "Excuse me, I think you hit my mailbox this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 486

You deserved it 44 869

Today, my car got broken into. A small folded plastic bag and a few toothpicks I got from a restaurant were stolen. It's going to cost me a few hundred bucks to fix and clean my car over a 10 cent bag and a few free toothpicks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 502

You deserved it 2 627

Today, I was running late for work and I was carrying my stuff to my car, handbag over my shoulder, laptop in one hand, and my coffee in the other. As I tried to unlock my car, I spilt the coffee all over myself, the car, and my laptop. Now, I’m sticky, wet, and my laptop won't turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 320

You deserved it 258

Today, after I cleaned out the fridge of things that expired months ago, my roommate got angry and insisted upon pulling all the moldy dairy products out of the garbage and putting them back because "they weren't mine and I shouldn't throw out other people's food." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 602

You deserved it 4 606

Today, I decided to be healthy and make a fresh juice out of carrots and apples. Apparently, something had gone bad and now my asshole feels like a bomb just went off inside it. Good start to a healthy lifestyle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 358

You deserved it 4 202