Unless I misunderstood, if you're the one eating it, it won't affect her at all. I would've ordered it anyway, if she would actually get offended by you not being allergic to something she would just have to get over it.

my thoughts exactly 98. of you're out to eat and that's what you want have it that day. it's not your problem she's allergic. those are the ones I can't stand.

99/98 - You realize that some allergies all you have to do is TOUCH the food and you get a reaction so sever it can kill you? Obviously they aren't going to be sticking their hands in your food, but what if you get some sauce on your hand and then touch them? There was a story about a girl who killed her boyfriend because she ate peanuts then kissed him several hours later.

Exactly, #115. If you're severely allergic to a food, they don't even necessarily have to touch you, just being near to that food can set it off. #99, you can't stand somebody because they're trying to stop themselves having a possibly fatal allergic reaction?

115 has it right. My husband is allergic to walnuts. Not deathly, but he feels like death by the time his immune system has had enough. He doesn't even have to eat the walnut itself. He ate something that merely *touched* something that had walnuts in it and was in the bathroom throwing up all night and having stomach cramps. Food allergies, severe or not, are not something to take lightly. Clearly you guys don't understand food allergies if you don't think that there is something a little bit wrong with this situation.

She is very sensitive and even smelling the steam from the dish can set off her allergies.

I think deliberately making all the food be something that somebody can't eat is pretty passive aggressive. Sorry your 'mother-in-law' has also been nasty to you though.

it's not all the food though, just des(s)ert. it's not that big of a deal.