Miscellaneous: Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean...

By vee2013 - 26/04/2014 04:22 - Canada - London

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor, I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 210

You deserved it 6 930

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Same thing different taste

By myheadhurts - 12/11/2013 02:14 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 121

You deserved it 3 135

By lalalalainie - 13/10/2012 06:45 - United States - Fullerton

Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 752

You deserved it 35 455

Make it stop!

By DBR - 23/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 899

You deserved it 11 471

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 015

You deserved it 9 308

Cool moves

By UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH - 09/11/2022 22:00

Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 186

By singing

By Ramb0 - 21/12/2019 01:00 - United Kingdom - Christchurch

Today, I was headbanging so hard to a song in the shower that I hit my head on the wall and got a concussion. I'm now in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 2 174

By iltdtsm - 15/08/2009 16:58 - Canada

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 221

You deserved it 3 263

By Anonymous - 10/01/2017 14:30

Today, I was in the kitchen with my mother putting up the dishes. I went to stand up from putting a pot in a lower cabinet and hit my head on the upper cabinet she left open by accident. Hello concussion number nine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 754

You deserved it 961

By Ihatecleaning - 14/01/2017 12:00

Today, I found out from the doctor that I have a concussion. Was it from a wicked sports injury? No, my idiot brother decided to judo kick the door open while I was on the floor vacuuming the front carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 285

You deserved it 545

By LacrosseFAIL - 16/07/2016 22:33 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after a long day at work, I walked into my room with the lights off and jumped on my bed. At least I would've if I haven't rearranged my room and instead face-planted onto my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 095

You deserved it 4 805

Kamon97 23

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:08

You had one job!

newzealand 28

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:12

I wish I had such excuses against cleaning my room... Or was this your plan all along? Cunning, I like it!

Comments

Kamon97 23

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:08

You had one job!

cumberbunny 17

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:17

Bad luck Brian.

glabberfasted 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:26

7 - Briana* OP is a girl :)

JMichael 25

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:47

And it wasn't cleaning her room.

jazzmin1997 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:09

You tried *star*

energizerbunny23 18

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:11

It's a sign you should clean your room another day

swaggalikethat 22

Saturday 26 April 2014 19:48

No, that's a sign you should never clean your room

LuluRichards 20

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:11

Well you tried, many have walked the path of productive-room-tidying, and many have failed...

newzealand 28

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:12

I wish I had such excuses against cleaning my room... Or was this your plan all along? Cunning, I like it!

Tbearshy 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:16

Lazy sub conscious

mattybstacks 8

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:18

On the bright side, you don't have to clean your room anymore.

daydreamer244 13

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:23

Sounds like something I would do....being clumsy sucks....I feel ya OP.

Mynamewontfi 40

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:27

Bringing laziness to a new level. Good job, OP.

Vanshikap 24

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:31

Haha. OP its a sign. ur room doesn't want to be cleaned. give up now,before you get hurt worse.

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The Top

Today, I met my boyfriend's family. He calls his parents things like “geriatric hag” and “old clown”. I was about to yell at him, but they started calling him “nancy boy” and “nerd”. Apparently they love each other, but only communicate through abuse. I can’t believe I may soon marry into this mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 614

You deserved it 1 291

Today, I sneezed so hard in a café that I scared a toddler, who screamed, causing another patron to drop their coffee. It was a chain reaction of chaos, all thanks to my nose's sensitivity to the smell of knock-off perfume wafting from a dude at the table next to ours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 107

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 143 574

You deserved it 16 446

Today, coming home after a hard day's work was so relaxing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 777

You deserved it 487

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 3 263

Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 732

You deserved it 5 220

Today, my mother called me from the other side of the world to tell me she's got Covid. She got it from a friend, who later told her that they had attended anti-mask rallies. She's only been visiting her friend because she needs internet to keep working and can't get it where she is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 145

Today, I volunteered at a 50 km trail race for charity and was at the service of a walker. It was fun until after the walk was completed, when he made me take off his boots and socks, and massage his big, super stinky, sweaty bare feet. His putrid feet were inches from my face the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 658

You deserved it 218