Miscellaneous: Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in...

By missy - 09/03/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 429

You deserved it 8 668

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Same thing different taste

Straining

By NoPeeGiven - 14/04/2013 05:10 - United States - Palatine

Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 888

You deserved it 9 986

Hygienic

By imfullthanks - 14/03/2009 23:06 - Norway

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 681

You deserved it 7 671

Well played

By anonymous - 05/03/2014 05:43 - United States - League City

Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 380

You deserved it 3 641

By I'm stupid - 25/11/2012 15:08 - United States - Naperville

Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 611

You deserved it 37 942

By analbel - 05/11/2018 12:00

Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 848

You deserved it 219

Busted

By Anonymous - 14/05/2010 04:33 - Canada

Today, after taking a pregnancy test and carefully disposing of all the evidence so no one would find out, I realized I left the receipt for it on the bathroom counter. I noticed too late as I watch my mom step out of the bathroom, and my step-father go in right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 096

You deserved it 32 406

By levi Glasscock - 15/04/2011 13:52 - United States

Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 133

You deserved it 2 982

Late arrival

By Nikki Lynn Richardson - 18/05/2020 02:00

Today, I went to the store to go buy a pregnancy test because my period was 7 days late. I get home, go into the bathroom, pull down my underwear, pee and come to find out I'd started my period when I looked at it after peeing on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 462

You deserved it 343

Taking the piss

By allie - 31/05/2021 22:01

Today, my mom forced me to take a drug test while she watched. I couldn’t do it due to nerves, so she grounded me because, "there's no way I would be nervous unless I was doing drugs." Nope, just a shy bladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 151

You deserved it 131

By anonymous - 17/09/2010 08:19 - United States

Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test saying "well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 741

You deserved it 7 347

Hannah_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 2:56

i totally thought it would have ended up as a drug test, not a pregnancy test.

Nuklear 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 2:54

clever.

Comments

JohnnyViola 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:32

:)))))) greenman :)

meddude 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:33

and greenman happens to just be an egotistical idiot that believes he's divine. therefore: epic fail.

sunshyne84_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:35

sounds like some bullshit my mom would have tried to pull, hopefully u had nothing to hide

yeahreally 6

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:36

wow..is that what its come to now?

jlcost05 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:39

hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaaha

vitaminsandminer 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:39

hahaha greenman is hilarous thats really clever of your mom but that sucks for you, especially if you are pregnant...

paniclovie 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:40

first off: #6: LMFAO <3333 and wow. piss thief. =O

JohnnyViola 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:41

#39 Technically she didn't steal it...

802_CRU 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:45

greenman worships himself. take that as you will...

Chocolate_Chunk 2

Thursday 10 June 2010 13:05

I worship myself every evening bevore bed. It makes you relaxed.

AntiqueTurquiose 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 3:45

greenman youre insane it made me lol. wow.. hopefully you arent actually pregnant!

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Today, while driving with my family, the car got stuck in a large patch of mud. My family of seven decided that I, the fifteen year old girl, would be best suited to push it out. After slipping, falling, and getting completely covered in mud, they finally called a tow truck. FML

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You deserved it 3 821

You’re probably wondering what this website is all about. Well, it’s basically a bunch of people who had enough humor to tell you all about their shitty lives, and what it was that made their day suck a big fat one. Some are sad in funny way, som...

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Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 379

You deserved it 4 776

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 800

You deserved it 30 066

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 199

You deserved it 17 041

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 313

You deserved it 6 398

Today, I got a new employee. She was putting photos on her desk and I noticed a familiar face. When I asked who he was to her, she said, “My husband.” I had been dating this guy for the past three months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 636

You deserved it 516

Today, my sister's boyfriend of over a year broke up with her. As her brother, I instinctively wanted to beat him up, but he is too much of nice guy for me to be able to hurt him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 256

You deserved it 1 047