By soulebelius - 07/09/2014 22:50 - United States

Today, my mother told me that she and my father aren't coming to my wedding if my estranged brother who stopped talking to me two years ago isn't invited. She claims they don't want to choose sides. Brother: 1. Me: 0. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 968
You deserved it 3 257

soulebelius tells us more.

soulebelius 17

Just a quick update from the OP: this isn't the first threat my mother gave me about this. She actually influenced my sister to have the same stance. Me and my sister worked it out, but my mom crossed the line. She brings this up when it benefits her ulterior motive to reunite the family (ain't mad at her for that), but it shouldn't be brought up while we're announcing our engagement, or introducing both families for the first time, or a casual conversation months later about us getting on the same insurance. The saddest part is... Me and the missus were planning on having only our closest immediate family. It was going to be around 10 total people. I told her she doesn't have to worry anymore: no need for them to go. Not even bitter. I just want to keep the focus on the happy couple and not use our day as a family counseling session.

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Top comments

shelbycobra0991 8

That definitely sucks, OP. They say they don't want to choose sides, but by not being a part of the most important day of your life, it seems as if they have. Just don't let it stop you from enjoying your day. Get relatives or close friends to stand in for them, and when it's all said and done and they see your beautiful pictures, I'm sure they'll feel quite bad for letting a family dispute get in the way.

110 2
fffianist 9

If you're confident he won't come anyway, you can send out an invite and simply tell your parents it's his choice not to be there.

81 4

Comments

tonyfan00 38

Welp. Think we found the favorite in this family.

2 0
aiyorob 1

Because of the shit my parents/brother pulled off in the last few months, trying to direct every part of my life, i simply told them to not come to my wedding. And they didn't attend at all. So, I get your frustration but you've got to think about Yourself first.

1 0
ashyknees 13

What did he do to make you stop talking to him?

0 0
soulebelius 17

Just a quick update from the OP: this isn't the first threat my mother gave me about this. She actually influenced my sister to have the same stance. Me and my sister worked it out, but my mom crossed the line. She brings this up when it benefits her ulterior motive to reunite the family (ain't mad at her for that), but it shouldn't be brought up while we're announcing our engagement, or introducing both families for the first time, or a casual conversation months later about us getting on the same insurance. The saddest part is... Me and the missus were planning on having only our closest immediate family. It was going to be around 10 total people. I told her she doesn't have to worry anymore: no need for them to go. Not even bitter. I just want to keep the focus on the happy couple and not use our day as a family counseling session.

56 0
soulebelius 17

Oh as for my brother, we did get into it again after I told my mom not to worry about her invite. After I overheard him shouting at my mom about talking to me was gay, he gave me congratulations. That lasted for 60 seconds until he told me to stop crying about us not talking. Once again I could be talking about getting a dog for our house, and his name gets brought up. IDGAF No invite for him, because he's toxic, he MIGHT show up because he basically told me he was forced to talk to me this last time and every other falling out, and he WILL show up to my wedding high and become a disturbance. I don't need that black cloud. It's not fair to me or my wife.

33 0
DanielleinDC 33

Might I politely suggest eloping since your family seems incredibly screwed up?

24 0
Hermmm 12

I'm sorry, but your parents are assholes

9 0
HomelessDonut 9

Just don't invite him. If you hate him then oh well! Also, your parents are just being disrespectful by not showing up because someone you hate wasn't invited to your wedding.

7 0
Sisonduty 8

Wow, that's.. harsh. I do hope your wedding come of smoothly

5 0
Taurus_ChicKa 36

I'm pretty sure putting you on the spot like that is the same as picking sides. So if she doesn't show up for your special day, that's her loss, OP. The day is about you and your special someone, not an estranged brother!

6 0