Intimacy: Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday...

By Creeped_out_n_stuck - 05/08/2011 04:46 - United States

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 558

You deserved it 3 729

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 09/06/2015 20:52 - Ireland

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 713

You deserved it 2 840

Roommate from hell #457

By Theguyinthedark - 30/06/2016 13:23 - Bangladesh

Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 168

You deserved it 1 151

Not helping

By StillUnemployed - 11/10/2021 20:00

Today, I received a call from a potential employer. I was excited, until my roommate starts loudly moaning sexually in the background. The interviewer got offended and hung up. My roommate did it because I "made her" pay my half of the rent this month. FYI, I’m unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 212

You deserved it 202

Cost of living crisis

By Jaded618 - 05/12/2010 12:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of eleven months broke up with me, but adamantly insisted I didn't move out of our apartment, because he can't pay the rent alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 570

You deserved it 3 939

By mackamuir - 01/04/2016 13:01 - Australia - Gold Coast

Today, my roommate played a crazy April Fool's joke on me by not paying his rent this month. Good one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 958

You deserved it 1 789

By Awkward - 04/02/2010 16:03 - France

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, claiming moving in was a bad idea and he is the type who needs his privacy. It was his idea to move in, he had to convince me. Now we are stuck, under lease together for the next 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 872

You deserved it 3 717

Gross

By Sticky floor - 27/07/2018 05:00

Today, my best friend and roommate has decided to "stop being controlled by society" while at home. This involves him walking around naked, masturbating whenever he wants, and not cleaning up his guys. I've stepped in it three times already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 867

You deserved it 387

By gutsforme - 11/08/2010 10:40 - New Zealand

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 388

You deserved it 4 486

By sen - 19/02/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, I was sleeping when my roommate walked in and asked me: "So… when are you leaving?" She had decided to throw a party in our apartment. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 399

You deserved it 2 639

Threesome weirdness

By Anonymous - 08/10/2020 02:01

Today, my roommate informed me that I need to move out, due to me having sex with his boyfriend. Even though he gave us permission, and told us to use protection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 1 246

gusgus36 5

Friday 5 August 2011 11:56

Well, that will be a fun 11 months...

imustbeinsane 2

Friday 5 August 2011 12:01

how much money are we talking about?

Comments

iiEnjoyTurtles 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 0:30

that's totally not gay.

iiEnjoyTurtles 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 0:30

that's totally not gay.

sjcluvslbm 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 8:19

Hahaha wtf??? That's some nasty shit right there.

tripp136 4

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:45

i liked where this was going until the last part...

SaRaBby786 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 10:17

... I think he likes dick. Get him a bf or gf

sparklecherry 4

Monday 8 August 2011 0:48

Kick his ass.

TallMist 32

Friday 29 May 2015 1:23

While what OP's roommate did was immature, I don't think he deserves getting beaten for it.

jb5794 1

Monday 8 August 2011 3:53

wow... well thats one FRIENDLY roommate haaa

habbdicted 6

Monday 8 August 2011 5:32

At least he offered money... idk why he couldn't just go watch free ****.

homesticker69 0

Monday 8 August 2011 6:33

Give the guy a break! D: it was his birthday. (Secret crush? I think so. >w

Meattymeatballs 2

Monday 8 August 2011 8:01

Hope it gets better

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Capitalism Coworkers Relatable Am I overreacting? Frustration Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I was on my way home from a friend's house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know I was on my way. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 074

You deserved it 6 726

Today, I'm working 12-hour overnight shifts for the next three days. My fiancee can't seem to grasp the concept of sleeping during the day, and keeps coming into the bedroom and telling me to stop being lazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 580

You deserved it 97

The Top

Today, at work, after a visit to the bathroom, the lock broke in my hand and the door was jammed. I called the janitor on my cellphone and told him about the situation. He told me to fill out a complaint and leave it in his post box. He then hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 289

You deserved it 2 786

Today, my father calculated that the only way we can afford to keep the house was if I get pregnant and claim child benefits. My family now won't speak to me because I refuse to do it. I'm 15 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 183

You deserved it 109

Today, during a game of manhunt, my brother and his friends thought it would be funny to tie me to a telelphone pole with my very own multicolored jumprope from when I was younger. They left me there. My mom drove by, stared and then laughed, She kept driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 692

You deserved it 5 131

Today, at 17 years-old my doctor told me my balls are riddled with multiple small cancerous tumours. They are now useless for sperm production and will have to be removed anyway to cure the cancer, but not to worry, for aesthetic reasons they can replace them with silicone balls instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 191

You deserved it 122

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 869

You deserved it 5 979

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of my local groceries store for employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicapped, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 668

You deserved it 32 783