Kids: Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused,...

By thanks sis - 22/10/2015 00:57 - United States - Reading

Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 778

You deserved it 3 977

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Same thing different taste

By bloody hell - 04/06/2015 05:59 - Philippines - Para?aque

Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 981

You deserved it 3 858

By jriese444 - 23/12/2011 15:45 - United States

Today, my sister is visiting. She used more toilet paper today than I have in two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 511

You deserved it 3 322

By 2gewd4u - 15/01/2012 01:24 - United States

Today, I walked in on my sister sitting on the toilet, trying to use "The Force" to pull over the toilet paper roll sitting on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 242

You deserved it 4 099

Just because you can don't mean you should

By Anonymous - 10/12/2020 20:06 - Nigeria

Today, I got stuck in my washing machine. When my sister saw me, she just left me there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 835

By IHateMySister - 02/01/2016 10:36 - Denmark - Kirke-hyllinge

Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 836

You deserved it 1 362

The Bathtub Incident

By Katie - 17/09/2019 12:01 - United States

Today, my little sister took a dump in our bath tub right before we were leaving for soccer practice. When my mom found it, she blamed it on me, then made me pick it up with my bare hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 911

You deserved it 137

Right in the snowglobes

By Anonymous - 29/09/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Tilehurst

Today, my sister kicked me in the balls just before I went into the bathroom, as she wanted to use the shower first. Later, when I came out of the bathroom, she kneed me this time in the same spot because apparently I always make a mess in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 198

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 10:00

Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 1 722

By shootme - 13/11/2011 22:46 - Canada

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 346

You deserved it 58 544

Bad pranks are annoying

By Anonymous - 17/01/2020 20:00

Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 703

You deserved it 324

Ameronot 14

Thursday 22 October 2015 11:05

Wow, ok, there is something seriously wrong with your sister, op.

opiate_ape 10

Thursday 22 October 2015 11:14

shit in her pillow case

Comments

samichiss 5

Monday 26 October 2015 6:08

I swear I read "sprinkled cake" instead of "sprained ankle". Bed time for me

NYGiants1925 22

Monday 26 October 2015 23:01

...WHAT THE HELL!?

MenAreFromVegas 5

Monday 26 October 2015 23:20

your sister is a selfish bitch who can't seem to spare a single thought for the needs of others.

DatBlueDerp 13

Thursday 14 April 2016 4:18

She's an ass

Dfma100 10

Tuesday 3 May 2016 2:34

What a bitch

Jester epic_151 11

Friday 23 February 2018 23:51

Set fire to all her clothes while shes asleep then lol

[email protected] 6

Sunday 8 December 2019 18:02

Was it difficult to help your sister! **** sake

Keywords

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USA, USA, USA, and more precisely Philadelphia. That's where we're landing today. When I first discovered Justin, on 9gag or an awesome website like that, I knew exactly this little guy was perfect to fit in the FML illustrated section. His crazy, c...

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 8

Today, my husband returned from a 6-week business trip. During that time, I put myself on a very strict diet/exercise regimen so I could surprise him with a hefty weight loss. He took one look at me and demanded to know who I was fucking on the side. Yeah, because that’s the only reason I lost weight. FML

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You deserved it 231

The Top

Today, I found out why my boyfriend wouldn't answer his phone last night. He was hanging out with our mutual friend all night. She had been texting me all night about what great sex she was having. My boyfriend was the only person there besides her brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 456

You deserved it 2 819

Today, I received the honorary title of "Student of the Month," because I'm the only quiet kid during class. Truth is, I just have no friends. I was given an award for being socially awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 800

You deserved it 2 515

Today, my boyfriend tickled me. In between laughs, I warned him that I was going to pee myself. He didn't believe me. After I actually did, he suggested we use a "safety word" from now on so that he will know when I'm being serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 4 794

Today, I was on a scavenger hunt. One of the things on the list was to ask a stranger to marry them. I saw an old lady in a wheel chair; I tried to make her day by asking her to marry me. She declined and attempted to run me over with her wheel chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 160

You deserved it 34 078

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 483

You deserved it 3 483

Today, I got my period while spray tanning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 571

You deserved it 543