Love: Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette.... - FML

By scotto - 23/02/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 483

You deserved it 3 482

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 920

You deserved it 6 674

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 673

You deserved it 9 512

By Sir Smokalot - 24/09/2009 08:05 - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 215

You deserved it 2 889

Fresh mints

By Julian - 22/12/2008 07:45 - France

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 199

You deserved it 44 959

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 07:35 - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 864

You deserved it 4 863

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 925

You deserved it 5 122

By thatsnice - 09/12/2014 21:19 - United States - Warwick

Today, I confessed to my roommate of 4 years that I'm in love with her. Her response? Sticking her tongue out at me and blowing a raspberry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 095

You deserved it 4 286

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 280

You deserved it 3 002

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 318

By leeceetaylor99 - 15/07/2013 16:47 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 881

You deserved it 3 896

Next

Top comments

poukey 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:15

Second Hand Smoke Breath?

BoredomKills 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:20

it doesn't have to be your roommate.

Comments

allieg 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:12

Or she could've taken up smoking on the sly? Paranoid much?

KyleSays1 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 23:29

o.o ****

astriofou 0

Monday 25 April 2011 22:54

Breath-mint anyone?

poukey 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:15

Second Hand Smoke Breath?

BoredomKills 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:20

it doesn't have to be your roommate.

Tbabyy1009 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:27

abahahahahhahaa #6 good plan. U should so do it. She prob is a cheating hoe

jadore_me 0

Friday 7 August 2009 11:16

mean.!

Spyingcheeseman 8

Wednesday 20 August 2014 1:58

nice abs dude

ohhhhh_dear 0

Monday 23 February 2009 7:45

im with #6. #9 is a little outrageous.

jayhawk63 0

Monday 23 February 2009 8:02

I like #9's suggestion. Hey, maybe she isn't cheating on you with your roommate. Maybe its some other random guy that smokes. Maybe a guy she met late one night in a bar. Maybe its a homeless guy who got a bit more than change. Maybe its a sixty year old addict. Or maybe its all those guys AND your roommate. Don't be so quick to jump to conclusions. Regardless, lose her ass.

SPEEDfreakz60 0

Monday 23 February 2009 9:08

smack the bitch. right across her dirty mouth.

Blind_Ninja 0

Monday 23 February 2009 9:27

Did you even bother asking her?

2random 0

Monday 23 February 2009 11:19

maybe she just had a smoke .. u should actually talk to her .. and ask her instead of jumping to conclusions..

Tempsey 0

Friday 17 June 2011 14:18

Well if she's actually cheating on him, do you think she'll tell him that?

Rayn4u_fml 0

Monday 23 February 2009 12:21

Unless the guy was smoking at the time they made out, actively blew smoke into her mouth, and she ran to kiss you right after, I'm not sure how this could have happened. She probably smoked one herself, maybe your roomate let her smoke one because she wanted to try, please just ask her before possibly making a big mistake.

Keywords

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Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

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The Top

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You deserved it 15 503

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I agree, your life sucks 26 392

You deserved it 1 588

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I agree, your life sucks 51 862

You deserved it 7 868

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I agree, your life sucks 28 565

You deserved it 5 684

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I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 114

Today, I found out my baby daddy, who left me when I was 4 months pregnant, has an Onlyfans and makes good money. My twins are 10 months-old and he has never paid a cent for child support. I’d take him to court but I can barely pay rent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 180

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