Kids: Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare,...

FML for mobile
Free

By Anonymous - 13/10/2014 00:38 - United States - Racine

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 021

You deserved it 5 178

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By afather - 14/06/2015 13:41 - United States - Worthing

Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 407

You deserved it 6 536

By Ramis182 - 03/10/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 770

You deserved it 6 031

Future Darwin Award

By don'tdrinkthat - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 611

You deserved it 4 920

By sickmom - 21/01/2014 11:07 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 631

You deserved it 5 526

About to Popov

By badmom - 27/03/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we'd ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 year-old to run to the store. She didn't want to, but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she'd made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 339

You deserved it 17 980

By Autocorrected - 26/11/2012 20:13 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 482

You deserved it 3 392

By Failed Parent - 11/10/2012 06:59 - United States

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 945

You deserved it 4 643

By StockedWithJuice - 06/07/2013 15:14 - United States - Austin

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 809

You deserved it 5 337

It burns

By WTF - 16/03/2011 22:05

Today, after my 22-year-old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 538

You deserved it 12 569

Big brained

By TiredTeacher95 - 22/01/2022 19:59

Today, I had to call poison control on one of my students, because they decided to drink a half a bottle of hand sanitizer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 208

You deserved it 102

little_aliceee 17

Monday 13 October 2014 9:31

I wonder how painful it will be when he *****....

Fuaaad1994 31

Monday 13 October 2014 9:31

He is going to regret it when he takes a dump

Comments

Jonesy272 15

Monday 13 October 2014 12:47

Well got to give him points for trying lol

3molliver3 16

Monday 13 October 2014 13:01

He'll be staying home, but it won't be with that

Goblin182 26

Monday 13 October 2014 13:06

I hate to think what that is doing to his stomach lining.

mosquito19 14

Monday 13 October 2014 13:12

tell him that hot sauce coming out will feel exactly like prison if he don't stay in school.

Gabilliam 19

Monday 13 October 2014 13:29

Congratulations on raising a winner!

vikky538 28

Monday 13 October 2014 13:51

an idiot with a hot sauce..

icekitten14 12

Monday 13 October 2014 14:19

*facepalm*

askullnamedbilly 33

Monday 13 October 2014 14:32

To quote Forrest Gump, 'stupid is as stupid does' and yes, OP's son behaved like a ******* moron. You should never shy away from telling your kids when they've done something unbelievably stupid, because if you do, they'll probably keep doing it. Parenting does not mean pretending everything your kids do wrong is just because they're misguided or don't know any better, that just produces entitled assholes.