Miscellaneous: Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called...

By Josh - 06/03/2015 00:25 - United States - Fenton

Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 935

You deserved it 7 853

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/05/2011 14:00 - Belgium

Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 183

You deserved it 4 167

Leg it

By BobbyHutchinson - 20/10/2009 15:57 - Australia

Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 955

You deserved it 2 846

By Anonymous - 14/02/2013 00:00 - Canada - Coquitlam

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 375

You deserved it 5 106

By sorrystupid - 02/06/2015 07:42 - United States

Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 483

You deserved it 5 297

By Anonymous - 09/08/2013 23:29 - Switzerland

Today, a man pulled a knife on me just so he could mug me of the cigarette I was smoking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 518

You deserved it 7 813

By tryingtostealmyheart - 19/12/2015 07:12

Today, a total stranger asked me to marry him while we were waiting for the bus. I turned him down. He then pulled a knife on me, grabbed my purse and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 175

You deserved it 1 656

Run!

By Anonymous - 05/11/2011 01:21 - United States

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 808

You deserved it 37 587

Sorry, man

By Lii - 24/03/2015 01:04 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 100

You deserved it 15 427

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 165

You deserved it 54 052

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 16:09 - Guatemala

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 125

You deserved it 3 179

Steffi3 40

Friday 6 March 2015 10:57

Never call someones bluff if you're not prepared to deal with the consequences

RMP15 8

Friday 6 March 2015 10:59

Whoa, hope you're ok OP

Comments

Wolfipoo 31

Friday 6 March 2015 15:11

That sucks OP, hope your not in too much pain.

JKPwnage 27

Friday 6 March 2015 15:26

Quote from man stabbed: "What're you gonna do, stab me?"

blackonblight 32

Saturday 7 March 2015 1:51

Ah, you saw that headline too?

drp513 3

Friday 6 March 2015 15:41

Well you're alive so that's good

Snowble11 13

Friday 6 March 2015 15:41

You aren't the US ambassador to South Korea, are you?

rhysfucker 24

Friday 6 March 2015 17:36

Three words: concealed carry permit.

TheGatekeeper43 8

Friday 6 March 2015 18:12

Why did he want to stab you? You don't get stabbed for no reason

EmoKami 21

Friday 6 March 2015 19:02

I bet he got his point across.

brandonthed 2

Friday 6 March 2015 19:44

And that's why you should always carry a gun.

CoolCookie210 22

Friday 6 March 2015 20:13

Hope you weren't hurt too badly! That's awfully scary. Were you in your own neighborhood? Are you okay? Where did he stab you?

ally8 21

Friday 6 March 2015 20:46

So you got stabbed in the back?!

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The Top

Today, I realized my (soon to be ex) boyfriend has been preemptively sending me his Snaps as regular chat photos/videos on Snapchat so our interaction could go down. This way, he can have the girl he’s been cheating on me with become his #1 best friend, thus demoting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 321

You deserved it 94

Today, as I experienced another bout of existential dread while trying to sleep, I declared that it would be the day I opened up to my family about the full extent of my mental health struggles. Also today, I didn't do it. Again. Because I'm anxious it may inconvenience them to worry about me too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 146

The Top

Today, I'm babysitting. The kids have only been home at the same time together for 15 minutes. Two of them have punched each other and the other is running in circles screaming. What is wrong with this picture? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 300

You deserved it 331

Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know…" and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 776

You deserved it 2 348

Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 520

You deserved it 52 529

Today, faced with the problem of my children fighting over which one of them was going to sit in the middle in the car’s back seat, I suggested that they take turns. Now, they’re fighting about who got to sit there the longest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 91

Today, my daughter asked me why NASA hasn't gone to the sun yet. She's seventeen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 468

Today, my extremely lazy colleague received a promotion with benefits, while I was fired for "not being a team-player". I had stayed quiet about her constant negative behaviour because my supervisor said we needed to "have each other's backs". While I was protecting hers, she put a knife in mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 054

You deserved it 822