Animals: Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw...

By penny-dropping - 16/04/2012 04:24 - United States

Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 419

You deserved it 3 141

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Same thing different taste

By GrahamCracker - 21/05/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 669

You deserved it 8 944

The fun never ends

By Yudith - 02/01/2023 03:00 - Canada

Today, I found a New Year's surprise: a cockroach in my kitchen drawers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 134

Hello little guy

By Anonymous - 14/05/2021 00:00

Today, I put my house shoes on without socks, but felt a rock in them. I shook it free and out dropped a half-crushed roach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 120

Creeped out

By Baustigt - 06/08/2014 13:34 - Australia

Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 992

You deserved it 4 590

Creepy crawlies

By Cockroachphobic - 04/04/2020 14:00

Today, I found out that the small bugs I've been blowing off my pillow all year are in fact baby cockroaches. I discover this when I found two full grown ones crawling around and decided to Google it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 449

You deserved it 917

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 284

You deserved it 3 662

By jaqlove - 02/07/2016 20:28 - United States - Clementon

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 026

You deserved it 2 643

By Anonymous - 30/11/2014 04:44 - United States - Mahwah

Today, I bought a Santa hat. After wearing the hat for a few hours, I noticed a strange lump near the tip of it. I stuck my hand inside to dig out the mysterious object. It was a dead cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 657

You deserved it 3 560

By Anna Lete - 12/07/2017 21:31

Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused a huge family of cockroaches to disperse. Did you know they can fly? FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 928

You deserved it 335

By lingadoo - 07/12/2012 05:46 - Kuwait - Kuwait

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 065

You deserved it 4 850

demonkonga 5

Monday 16 April 2012 12:00

1 Spray it with pesticide 2 burn that shit and laugh like a maniac 3 throw it away and buy a new one

SliceOfCake 9

Monday 16 April 2012 12:01

Why were you searching that much for a penny, anyway?

Comments

mshahabkaleem 0

Monday 16 April 2012 15:08

Make them Indians eat the cockroaches..those bastards like that shit

Isquatjarz 0

Monday 16 April 2012 16:12

Goes to show your Jewish.

Stefania_P_fml 2

Monday 16 April 2012 16:13

That's pretty disgusting, hope you'll get rid of them..!!

wyz135 7

Monday 16 April 2012 16:17

Mothballs should do the trick. I hate cockroaches too, I swear they're the incarnate of devil.

augmented 1

Monday 16 April 2012 16:33

One roach is the start of an army. Don't bring it home OP!!

Bohanan88 0

Monday 16 April 2012 17:04

Ewwww...Take that ish to the dry cleaners!

katcot99 11

Monday 16 April 2012 17:20

It was supposed to be a comment for #1...oops.

kay_princess14 7

Monday 16 April 2012 17:36

Omg

doctorhook86 24

Monday 16 April 2012 18:06

Where were you that it was normal for pennies to spontaneously drop into or into things?

linkinpark98 23

Monday 16 April 2012 18:09

This made my skin crawl... D:

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The Top

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 055

You deserved it 8 438

Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 568

You deserved it 19 251

The Top

Today, I went to go cash a check that I'd been holding onto, so that I wouldn't spend the money until we really need it. When I was at the check stand, the man asked why I held onto the check for so long. I told him why. He went on to explain that the check had now expired, and I could no longer cash it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 1 526

Today, I forced myself into work with severe laryngitis. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, except I work at candy and ice cream store at a major tourist destination. For seven hours I had to communicate with unsympathetic adults and screaming, bratty kids by miming and using a dry erase board. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 884

You deserved it 8 563

Today, I realized I've been saying "Excuse me" to automatic sliding doors for the past week. They haven't responded yet, but I'll keep you posted on their social skills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 168

Today, I found out that the guy I've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me "Baby." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 022

You deserved it 70 681

Today, I was arguing with my fiancée, having the same argument I had with my ex wife. “Why should I get off early for the kids?”, “Why can’t you do it?” Because I’d forfeit $200 per day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 660

Today, I crashed into a ditch on my way home from work. I had to walk 2 miles in -25 below zero weather before I could pick up a cell phone signal to call a tow truck. When I got back to my car, a cop was waiting for me with a ticket for leaving the scene of an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 456

You deserved it 2 359