Health: Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused... - FML

By Anna Lete - 12/07/2017 21:31

Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused a huge family of cockroaches to disperse. Did you know they can fly? FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 928

You deserved it 335

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By CockroachCluster - 02/06/2018 01:30

Today, I turned on my A/C for the first time in a couple of months. A family of ginormous cockroaches climbed out of the air vent and a few clumps of dead cockroaches fell to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 117

You deserved it 485

Hi guys

By unemployed - 11/07/2016 19:09 - United States - Modesto

Today, I walked out the back door of my place of employment and looked down to see a huge cockroach. This is quite a normal occurrence, so I thought nothing of it until I realized it was struggling to drag the corpse of one of its friends into the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 262

You deserved it 819

By Anonymous - 12/06/2015 05:35 - Australia - Rydalmere

Today, I was studying for a big test I have next Tuesday in my room. I heard a creak in my ceiling but assumed it was nothing as my house is old. Thirty seconds later something fell from my air vent directly onto my head. It was a giant cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 582

You deserved it 2 139

My little friends

By Annonymous - 18/10/2012 14:41 - United States

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 451

You deserved it 1 953

By no name - 22/02/2011 12:25

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 959

You deserved it 4 787

By youngboob - 21/10/2014 15:42 - United States - Topeka

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 210

You deserved it 3 690

Get away from me!

By Bobby The Baker - 03/04/2019 16:00

Today, a cockroach flew towards me, and out of panic I dropped my car keys in the sewer. Not only did I lose my keys, but the cake I made for a client is stuck inside the car. It's for a wedding, and they're arriving in the reception area in a few minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 158

You deserved it 479

By jaqlove - 02/07/2016 20:28 - United States - Clementon

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 026

You deserved it 2 643

By penny-dropping - 16/04/2012 04:24 - United States

Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 419

You deserved it 3 141

Ewwwwwwww

By Warriorwizzle - 15/12/2018 04:00 - Vietnam - Hanoi

Today, I had to move down to the third floor because after complaining about rats on my rooftop the landlord put down traps. The rats died. Flies came. The flies laid eggs. The eggs birthed maggots. The maggots rained down from my broken ceiling into my bed and all over my floor. I'm not okay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 098

You deserved it 235

Next

Top comments

Regulate 21

Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:52

I find that the wings give it away.

arisanator9900 20

Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:33

the only solution is to burn the place to the ground

Comments

arisanator9900 20

Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:33

the only solution is to burn the place to the ground

gobiteme2 34

Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:33

Fly, fly away

Regulate 21

Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:52

I find that the wings give it away.

Demon_of_Light 27

Thursday 13 July 2017 7:32

Penguins have wings. They can't fly.

Regulate 21

Thursday 13 July 2017 19:58

They were wings a long long time ago. Now they are flippers. Thank you for playing though.

Demon_of_Light 27

Saturday 19 August 2017 20:07

Well played, sir.

CrazyTrainWreck 19

Wednesday 12 July 2017 22:00

Well what do you expect from the creatures that will be the only living thing after a nuclear apocalypse.

jediemma 9

Wednesday 12 July 2017 22:45

This is one of my (many) nightmares.

AnthonyCS5 19

Thursday 13 July 2017 0:03

FLY, My Pretties, FLY!!!!!

8313girl 28

Thursday 13 July 2017 1:40

My phone won't show where you live but I assume you must live up north. Down south we call those Tree roaches. And yes I'm more scared of them then snakes.

amberfox 11

Thursday 13 July 2017 2:26

In my part of Texas we call them waterbugs. I'm pretty sure they can sense fear.

Birdie27 11

Thursday 13 July 2017 2:42

I live in North Carolina, and we call them palmetto bugs, to "honor" our neighbors to the south.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Thursday 13 July 2017 2:31

No, actually, I didn't know they could fly, even though they have wings... now I hate them even more! Ugh!

sillymama 21

Thursday 13 July 2017 5:29

"Yes officer, I set fire to my building.... They were flying... like the monkeys from the evil queen!!"

skippydoda 32

Thursday 13 July 2017 11:39

The monkeys are with the wicked witch of the west

Madrias 36

Thursday 13 July 2017 7:30

I think the most effective plan would be a flamethrower.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went into work. After three years of working 55 hours a week, they fired me by putting the contents of my locker at the front door, with a note that said "If not picked up by 10:00 am stuff will be donated." I work the night shift. I just lost three sweaters, two pairs of shoes, $60, and my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 550

You deserved it 2 738

Today, accustomed to dealing with my old car's faulty accelerator, I pressed the pedal way too hard in my new car and crashed into a pillar, totaling the engine, and giving myself a concussion. I could still see the dealership down the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 542

You deserved it 4 219

The Top

Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 037

You deserved it 3 518

Today, my husband said he was going to get errands. According to his job’s Instagram page which I follow, he was actually at his work Christmas formal. He never invited me. That’s not all. I also found his wedding band in the bathroom sink. Very close to the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 406

You deserved it 140

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 475

You deserved it 4 811

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and had a fistfight with a dumb teenager, which was bad enough, but he also lost the fight, which was just pathetic and embarrassing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 475

You deserved it 267

Today, my youngest son, for the third time, decided that the toilet is not where he wants to go to the bathroom. This wouldn't be an issue if he wasn't also squatting in the yard to take a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 212

Today, I woke up duct-taped to the toilet in nothing but a straitjacket. I don't remember what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 472

You deserved it 2 042