Work: Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the...

By heyyoitsapotato - 31/05/2013 02:35 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 141

You deserved it 3 300

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/03/2014 21:53 - United States - Springboro

Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 518

You deserved it 3 845

Cute

By benjo - 06/08/2013 18:07 - United States

Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year-olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 058

You deserved it 4 844

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 17:37 - Australia - Engadine

Today, some kid decided to pee in the kids' play area at work. Because I was the shortest employee working at the time, I got to climb through the area to mop it up, while all the kids pointed and laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 410

You deserved it 1 856

By corn - 03/06/2011 01:44 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 294

You deserved it 3 297

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 20:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 644

You deserved it 6 655

By kellb123 - 18/12/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was at work, and was told to clean up the urine that a child had left down the slide inside the play place. While in the slide, another little kid peed on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 513

You deserved it 2 575

Teaching moment

By poolboy - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 640

You deserved it 9 390

Bad moon rising

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 14:00 - United States - Salem

Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 93

By qtpieo1 - 13/08/2010 16:14 - United States

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 512

You deserved it 9 736

By Teach - 31/03/2015 07:40 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, I took my class to swimming lessons at the local public pool. One student came out and proudly told me that she'd pooed in the shower, but it was OK because she'd then picked it up and flushed it down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 436

You deserved it 2 546

Bano360 25

Friday 31 May 2013 12:47

Main reason I do not want to have kids. 4 siblings is enough.

sleepwalker13 25

Friday 31 May 2013 12:49

Kids these days have no manners

Comments

goose12321 11

Friday 31 May 2013 19:54

I hope you kicked his ass. Whoever urinates on someone clearly doesn't deserve any respect what so ever.

KareBear7364 5

Friday 31 May 2013 20:09

oh how I miss being a lifeguard at a water park...

katejones 8

Friday 31 May 2013 20:32

Ban both kids for a year.

Inkedldd 8

Friday 31 May 2013 20:46

Those kids are evil little bastards. Another reason to not have kids.

unixdude 9

Friday 31 May 2013 21:07

We're the paramedics able to save the kid after you beat him bloody? Too bad - I'm sure he would have made such a promising member of society.

worldclassrager 39

Friday 31 May 2013 22:07

I don't understand what kids think at times...

KM96 24

Friday 31 May 2013 22:22

Ewwww tmi

petergozinya37 8

Friday 31 May 2013 22:32

I would've kicked the kid.

otecasacid 22

Friday 31 May 2013 23:22

lifeguarding made me hate kids. At least I did it in a lake, (a very murky dirty one at that), so if a kid took a dump I didn't even know about it. Most of them have no respect for authority, and made me wish my position allowed me to slap them, and keep my job.