Work: Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station...

By aragmir - 18/12/2016 06:10 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 703

You deserved it 2 876

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 10:15 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 972

You deserved it 3 122

Caught in 480p

By fxck - 04/02/2015 19:28

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumbs-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 482

You deserved it 3 584

By not telling you my name - 07/08/2015 15:16 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I went to take a dump at work. The silence in the room was deafening, and I ended up singing to myself. After I proudly finished, there was a short silence, followed by a coworker in the next stall saying, "Um... don't quit the day job, Rick." I'll never live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 639

You deserved it 5 816

By kingkobrastrikes - 21/01/2015 01:56 - United States

Today, I was asleep and snored so loud that I woke myself up. I was at work and I am now the laughing stock of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 519

You deserved it 20 540

The unexpected

By RikkiTikkiTavi - 12/11/2019 05:00

Today, I was working at my desk and wearing my new noise cancelling headphones. I couldn’t hear anyone around me, so I let out a nice long fart. Every desk behind me was occupied and the fart was not silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 3 642

Ight imma head out

By Anonymous - 10/10/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I was nervously observing a delicate medical procedure while training at my new job. I tried to stifle a sneeze and instead (as you can probably guess) ripped the biggest, most cartoonishly loud fart of my life. My ass sounded like a tuba and I was asked to leave the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 146

By mortified - 30/10/2010 04:12 - Canada

Today, at work, I was caught picking my nose, on camera, in an elevator. The security guard stopped me on my way out of the building to tell me how funny it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 607

You deserved it 30 963

By anon - 03/08/2016 03:28

Today, I was working at the hospital and it was very busy. Unthinking, I told a patient in a wheelchair to "sit tight" while I checked on something. He mocked me for the rest of his stay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 168

You deserved it 2 552

**** OFF, thanks

By please leave... - 13/02/2013 19:33 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 171

You deserved it 6 375

By Snails - 12/06/2019 20:00

Today, while at work, I let out a nasty wet fart, thinking no one would hear me since I work in a warehouse. My coworker did hear me, and replied, "WTF? Shots fired! Shots fired!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 738

Sarah K. Oller 2

Sunday 26 February 2017 1:34

they're not patients in a nursing home, they're residents

Tripartita 44

Friday 23 December 2016 9:13

"Today, I realized I'm so deprived of human interaction and quality comedy that simply seeing somebody whom I earlier witnessed farting is enough to send me into uncontrollable laughter. Please help. FML"

Comments

Gladriele 3

Friday 23 December 2016 13:23

Here I am thinking he meant wank

Colon_Man 17

Friday 23 December 2016 15:09

The old man probably lets a little one go every time he giggles.

dabomsht123 3

Friday 23 December 2016 15:17

Thought u was talking about jerking off.

worthypegram1 13

Friday 23 December 2016 19:38

My first thought was masturbation.. lol

CastaP 12

Saturday 24 December 2016 4:50

Wauw, work on your choice of words, way too many people thought you rubbed one out ?

Grapesnake5523 6

Saturday 24 December 2016 5:26

Probably a redneck

chighy 8

Saturday 24 December 2016 7:11

I thought you meant sneak a person out and I was very confused.

Wormgod 10

Sunday 25 December 2016 14:50

Why would you ********** at work?

aragmir 13

Thursday 29 December 2016 7:22

And here I was trying to word it nicely, lol! I know "rub one out" is slang for fap but never figured "sneak one out" would be so gravely misinterpreted. Oh well, joke's on me once more I guess xD He doesn't snicker anymore tho so it's cool now.