Twatted

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Mclean

Today, a girl I follow on Twitter tweeted, "Why can't I have a cute math tutor?" I'm her math tutor. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 262
You deserved it 4 258

Top comments

Schizomaniac 24

Now you answer all her questions with "I DON'T KNOW WHY DON'T YOU ASK A CUTER TUTOR." Immaturity, my friend.

Trix_Disorder 20

She didn't even have the decency to make an "acute" pun, eh? Shame.

Comments

VScpu 3

This FML looks related to the one posted on 1/14/13 6:52 pm. Hmmm same person maybe.

It's not your job to be cute but to tutor math. Anyhow that's still not a confidence booster.

rogerdodgeroz 4

Hey maybe op is cute and she knows he is following her on twitter and is letting him know she wishes she had him

Then explain me why it would be an fml? Your explanation sounds as unlikely as a conspiracy theory.

Visit stylist (professional makeup can do miracles) then charge triple amount for the lessons.

Wtf are you doing following her on twitter? Be-*******-have your ugly self.

perdix 29

CTFD, if she pretended to let you think you have a snowball's chance in Hell to get in her pants, you'd be tutoring her in math (and science and history and English, etc.) for free. Now that you know you are a troll, you can take your well-deserved cash from her.

#27 Well you have a quite low opinion of men. So you imply that no men will do a nice thing without expecting sex in return? Besides, tutoring is a job. I'm pretty sure that all guys who have student jobs don't have them in the hope they're gonna get laid. That girl is not only shallow, but pretty stupid as well.

perdix 29

#31, you do realize I AM a man, and yes, I know how we operate. I'm not saying the men expect immediate sex for every little service, but we are motivated to think these might eventually lead up to sex. You'll find guys will jump at the chance to help a cute girl faster than helping and ugly one, or a dude.

# 51 > I guessed you were a man, considering your language... However, not everyone is as desperate to get sex as you seem to think. I know that there are genuinely selfless guys out there. I am in fact about to marry one. :)

perdix 29

#72, so, he's lost interest in sex before the marriage? That's going to end up well.

# 76 > On the contrary. I know that when my fiancé does nice things, it's purely out of good heart, because he never had to beg for sex :)

I love how girls talk about how they have the perfect guy who doesn't care about sex and does everything out of the kindness of his heart.....in a few months when the relationship goes south, she'll be singing a whole different song.

> 84: We're getting married in August, I think we're pretty ok commitment wise :) . Guys like you are the reason why men have such a bad reputation. There have been times where I was working out some issues and was off sex for a while as I was not up for it. He has always been understanding and never pressured me. Yes sex is important for both of us and we greatly enjoy it, but that's not what drives us to be together. It's not because you would not do anything to make a girl happy without an agenda of your own that everyone is like you. Maybe one day you will be in love and you will understand what I mean.

What, you're a math tutor and you're not cute?

Since she doesn't find you a cute tutor; flirt with her.. She'll probably hate her life.

tj5810 21

Tweet how you wish all of the students you tutor didn't look so much like filthy bridge trolls... Maybe she'll get the hint. And just for effect, throw in that one student smells like a homeless man... Keep her guessing.

Maybe he's a student tutor?? (Idk the name for it) We had those in school..

Mister_Triangle 21

That makes it worse. If he were tutoring a middle school kid, he could shrug it off as a generational thing (guess I don't look like Justin Beiber). But being implicitly called "ugly" by a girl your own age is just shitty.