Health, Accident and Miscellaneous: Wham bam thank you m'am - FML

Wham bam thank you m'am

By ohhmydamn - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out if you slide down the stairs on a foam mattress topper, it just folds under instead of sliding. Then you slide the rest of the way down on your knees and break your nose at the bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 873

You deserved it 71 572

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

crazy_cat_lady 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 2:08

Thank you for the extremely funny visual. That was wonderful!!!

jenkins56 5

Saturday 1 August 2009 2:06

Haaa! Oh dear, GIANT FAIL!!!

Comments

caitiebug1119 15

Monday 1 July 2013 4:21

Right, because foam mattress toppers are always stiff as a board otherwise. Idiot. Did you not notice it folding all over the place on the way to the stairs? YDI.

SonyIsGod 13

Thursday 28 November 2013 13:25

Foam? C'mon, YDI.

Messeract 4

Thursday 20 March 2014 5:26

This should be a keyboard cat feature

daken96 21

Friday 15 May 2015 17:31

You gotta grab the top and curl it up like a sled. Then it works.

emeraldarcher74 30

Saturday 9 April 2016 0:16

Legolas fail.

TheGestalt97 11

Monday 8 June 2020 0:37

I’m putting ydi not because you should have known that would happen but because it would have been dangerous anyway.

Keywords

Animals Gross Poopoo peepee Cats Love Awkward Smells Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Christmas Work Social Media Grieving Music Boredom Anniversary Abuse Ironic Intimacy AITA Alcohol Am I overreacting? Transportation Drunk Gun control Parents Kids

The Top

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 975

You deserved it 3 568

Today, it was my two year anniversary with my boyfriend. As we were about to exchange gifts, he got a call and said he had to go home immediately. What was the emergency? His guild leader couldn't find another healer to finish a raid and promised my boyfriend gear if he would step up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 163

You deserved it 4 703

The Top

Today, I walked into the gym to do legs and walked up to the leg press machine where a trainer was taking weights off. I asked him if he was about to use the machine and he gave me an odd look and said no, then walked back to his client who was in a wheelchair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 148

Today, a customer told me it was bullshit we couldn't serve coffee because of the COVID restrictions, and added that the protests and riots happening are because people are bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 258

Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh... That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 222

You deserved it 546

Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 435

You deserved it 13 265

Today, at work, the prizes were given to the employee of the month. They come in to surprise the winner and give prizes. They come over to my cubicle and cover me with silly string. Jokingly, I said: "Do you guys have the wrong cubicle? " They did. The guy in the next cubicle won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 517

You deserved it 6 714

Today, I used the phrase "bitch please" in real life. It was funny until the "bitch" bitch-slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 468

You deserved it 34 070