Roommate, Creepy and Awkward: Who? - FML

Who?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate, asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 638

You deserved it 1 811

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Awkward_Science 2

Friday 24 August 2012 9:11

Man, burglars are getting lazy.

sniperkit 10

Friday 24 August 2012 9:11

I think that you need new locks, maybe? Or.. you know.. use your current ones.

Comments

the_true_batman 10

Friday 24 August 2012 22:02

I live in Saskatchewan too. OP, if you live in Saskatoon I'll take on the case of the mystery couch crasher for a dime and your roommate's phone number. Complete satisfaction or your money back. ;)

KML92 5

Saturday 25 August 2012 0:37

I had a similar incident a few years ago when I still lived with my parents. Except it was my mom texting me.

MillieeToweey 1

Saturday 25 August 2012 19:26

Why is that **** my life?

trendsetta010 4

Sunday 26 August 2012 17:26

Hey that's guy on the couch he's cool

longtimesunshine 4

Sunday 26 August 2012 20:40

aside from that not actually being your friend, why was your roommate "angry"

LadyJoker21 0

Friday 31 August 2012 12:46

Damn time to move

Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Awkward Embarrassing Health Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Love Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers

The Top

Today, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I can only have sex with really fat men, because that’s what turns me on, yet as soon as the sex is over, through no fault of theirs, I have to run to the toilet to be sick because I can’t believe what I just had sex with. I’m so messed up in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 2 524

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

The Top

Today, I had my first appointment with my new therapist. After I told her my family history and past abusive situations, she looked at me and asked, "How are you still sane?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 841

You deserved it 152

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 852

You deserved it 80 961

Today, my twin sister gave birth and somehow now weighs less than before she was pregnant. She also has huge boobs now and not a stretch mark in sight. Meanwhile, I’m still carrying an extra 15 pounds, even though I gave birth 5 years ago, and so many stretch marks I look like a fat zebra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 513

You deserved it 343

Today, my girlfriend filmed a video about violence in sexual relationships for a class. I expected a monologue kind of thing. She then told me it was an example video of an encounter with a male classmate. She showed me. It’s pretty much porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 241

Today, my shoulder was pulled out of its socket when I was helping a customer load a desk into his vehicle and he decided to answer his cell phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 797

You deserved it 2 522

Today, I went to go see my boyfriend of over two years in a play. I knew that he'd be kissing his female opposite at the end of the show, and I was okay with that. I snuck into his dressing room at intermission to find him "rehearsing" with her half-naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 031

You deserved it 3 402