Intimacy, Relationships and Sleep: Women shouldn't fart?

Women shouldn't fart?

By single again - 06/04/2021 17:00

Today, I slept in the same room as my girlfriend for the first time. She is sweet, smart, and drop-dead gorgeous, so naturally I thought she was going to be the one. Until she farted in her sleep. 56 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 3 167

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Same thing different taste

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 580

You deserved it 4 540

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 393

Love is…

By gassygirlfriend - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Nampa

Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 371

You deserved it 5 275

It's a gas gas gas

By wtf?? - 17/01/2022 02:02

Today, it took a whole year to convince my girlfriend to sleep in the same bed as me, because she was afraid she’d fart. Every time, I assured her she was just being paranoid. Turns out, she farts more than anyone I’ve ever slept with. Combined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 179

You deserved it 510

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 113

You deserved it 41 514

By Gas-pingForAir - 19/09/2016 08:59 - United States - Columbia

Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 788

You deserved it 1 671

By Big Baby - 28/01/2017 00:00

Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 455

You deserved it 809

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 787

You deserved it 13 981

Cute

By Anonymous - 22/04/2022 18:00 - Canada - Québec

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate in the bed for the first time. Halfway through the session, she slowly leaned over to my ear, thinking she was going to say something dirty. Instead, she decided to let out a long burp because she thought it was "cute". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 243

You deserved it 230

Protip

By Herman - 13/02/2023 06:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 473

Jon Tessler 14

Tuesday 6 April 2021 18:12

if you break up with her over a natural bodily function, then you deserve to be single your whole life. get over yourself

cuz803 44

Tuesday 6 April 2021 17:02

If thou loves the beautiful maiden, he shall tolerate fellow maiden's gassy bum bum

Comments

Sweetie 5

Tuesday 6 April 2021 20:53

You counted??? WTF

XxTruthBoyXX 3

Tuesday 6 April 2021 21:56

Could be what she ate

littlemissterry 6

Tuesday 6 April 2021 22:19

because heaven forbid her body does something natural....

rainbowdonnareed 18

Tuesday 6 April 2021 23:57

I have IBS glad my wife loves me

princess98 8

Wednesday 7 April 2021 2:24

I seem to miss how her farting really meant you had to dump her? Do you not fart?

Ins0mau 20

Wednesday 7 April 2021 6:08

I agree with the support for the young lady. But I guarantee, if it had been about a guy farting in bed the comments wound just be about how gross guys are.

Jonkbaby 22

Wednesday 7 April 2021 13:29

what are you, 12?

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Wednesday 7 April 2021 21:02

Look, I get it, she farts more than you think you do, and you're masculinity is threatened. But might I remind you that she has a ****** which can also make those sounds and if you did the dirty beforehand that might have come in to play just saying but if this made you single you deserve it and you're a shit human being and you're probably fart more and you're sleeping you think you do you.

SM79 6

Wednesday 7 April 2021 22:09

Dude...EVERYONE farts in their sleep. Even you. Grow up. And maybe that one night was excessive amounts due to something she ate. Again, grow up.

DanielleinDC 33

Thursday 8 April 2021 12:55

So what if she farts in her sleep? People do weird things when they're sleeping, and it's not like she can control it. Now, it could very well be something she ate, or it could be indicative of a digestive issue. If you're mature enough, ask her about it and see if you can find a way to reduce the gas expulsion.