I wonder how you even ban people from such stores ? It's not like they have a list of troublemakers' photos or an ID checkpoint at the entrance (or do they ? lol) ... Why not just walk in there and avoid the employees who saw your shenanigans last time

This town seems like a small place, that's probably why they can ban people because they will be able to recognize faces. OP probably visited the store regularly, so most of the workers probably recognize their face.

You can get banned from supermarkets. It happened to me after my wife bent down to pick up a can of beans.

You might have been able to convince them not to ban you in the first place if you had helped clean up your mess.

I want nothing more than you mother your children. Although I'm highly aware my womb probably won't be able to contain the awesomeness that is your spawn.

#2- I think I'm attracted to your puns..or maybe it's the mushy.

Spawn's a bit of a harsh word for my progeny! I don't look that much like an alien do I?

Pleonasm ~ I thoroughly enjoy your puns. Congratulations my good man :D I love your picture as well. Mustaches are just great :D

17 - Not anymore since you changed your pic. Perhaps 9 is thinking of the old one? Something tells me I wouldn't want to have Thane's babies... Cross-species birth always seemed like such a painful, messy affair to me. And whoa, when did you become such a ladies' man? Wish I could grow a sweet 'stache :(

No, you don't LOOK like an alien. That stache makes you outta this world though.

17- Well, I couldn't find a good enough picture of Thane, and the picture I currently have seems to give me a cool, Italian Plumber-esque edge, so that explains it! 26- I must say, I'm a Lidl flattered by your compliments, and your puns are stellar.

Woops, 24, not 17 is who that first statement should be directed at. Pleonasmian Slip I guess.

#2 I hate you pic and u should die your a dake

Since when has fml turned into eharmony? Guess I didn't get the memo

Honey badger don't care. Honey badger don't give a shit! I'm guessing you didn't get that memo either. :)

Well #40, that memo I did receive. You just haven't checked my profile yet.

Not at first... Because just like HB I didn't give a shit. =] I'm extremely pleased that you did get that one though. You should receive the new memo in about 3-5 days.

Lol good one :) ... Gotta love the nasty ass HB

Oh god, please stop with the puns. It was funny when I read your first 10 comments but I'm pretty sure the FML community is annoyed with you now.

53 - Yes, they are clearly all annoyed with him. Hence all the "You're my favorite commenter," and "I want to father your children," comments following nearly all of his pun comments.

It's all about the element of surprise.

Some people are just REALLY jumpy. I suggest never watching scary movies with them. Physical injury is guaranteed.

No overreaction you stupid jerk

I think 4 meant the store's reaction.

@31 - Well I mean the OP's reaction. What the hell did your brother do to scare you?

I did that once; I just let my moustache grow out into this. Seriously you should see me clean shaven- at least with facial hair no one verifies that I am indeed an adult.

I would hope that the management, especially the owner, of the only grocery store, in what sounds like a relatively small town, is aware of the fact that they are the only grocery store in town. If they are not aware of that fact, then they have extremely poor management skills as they do not pay any attention to possible competitors in the area.

I'm from a small town with only one grocery store. Their management isn't the best because they have no competition. I never heard of anyone being banned but someone attempted to steal something and he wasn't allowed back in without someone else with him.