Intimacy: Today, I was doing laundry while my boyfriend was sitting at...

By RuasaLove - 30/07/2015 02:34 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, I was doing laundry while my boyfriend was sitting at the table playing on his phone. I glanced over and caught him watching my ass as I put clothes in the dryer. Trying to be sexy, I looked at him as I slowly bent over to put more clothes in. Instead, I hit my head hard on the dryer door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 445

You deserved it 8 909

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Same thing different taste

Heat of passion

By owl + bungee cord - 07/01/2014 20:38 - United States - Herndon

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 540

You deserved it 10 057

Smooth operator

By Nic - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 954

You deserved it 46 062

Oh hi!

By showerstupid - 04/04/2009 08:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 648

You deserved it 44 832

By anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 422

You deserved it 4 472

Steamy

By Hotdamn - 21/03/2016 04:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 288

You deserved it 3 185

Sick moves, dude

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 405

You deserved it 4 241

Check these out!

By elevenharries - 03/06/2010 08:54 - United Kingdom

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 106

You deserved it 42 370

Major romcom vibes

By staciedee - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 578

You deserved it 5 024

Wrong sort of poking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 194

You deserved it 9 740

By 20lbknockout - 20/10/2009 04:26 - United States

Today, I was exercising, laid on my back, lifting weights over my head. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to casually sit by my feet and suddenly tickle them mercilessly. Caught off guard, I started wiggling, laughed and dropped the weights. On my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 100

You deserved it 3 548

jayennachristine 23

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:13

Quit banging the dryer and ban him

djcity 11

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:11

Hey who put that there....

Comments

djcity 11

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:11

Hey who put that there....

Swandive235 27

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:07

I did

nutella4life 14

Friday 31 July 2015 4:39

you ruined it

Zwerik 31

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:12

I'm sure he appreciated the effort. :)

GreyJedi 10

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:12

That's not the way to bang your head. Don't worry, he'll show you.

brycemash 9

Friday 31 July 2015 4:49

This doesnt make sense at all.

AnalAssassin1 14

Friday 31 July 2015 5:52

This sounds violent...

tonedef456 8

Sunday 2 August 2015 21:29

You know it's violent when someone named the analassassin thinks it is.

jayennachristine 23

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:13

Quit banging the dryer and ban him

Murilirum 23

Friday 31 July 2015 1:58

My golden line.... And you got there first -_-

assurant 12

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:18

don't lie we've all done that some point in our lives

Corey122726 17

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:29

I don't know about you, but I've never tried to be sexy for any man in my life time. Nor would I have ever stuck my ass out for another man who is trying to discreetly look at it. So no sir, we have not all been there or done that in our lives.

pjsr 32

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:52

What's wrong with trying to be sexy for someone you're in a relationship with? Or looking at the ass of someone you're in a relationship with? Try being a little playful #13, your significant other might actually like it.

boating_guy 33

Thursday 30 July 2015 16:11

13 is just making a play on words cause he's a dude and would like to emphasize his masculinity by making it clear he is straight as an arrow. If he was a woman, that would be a different story...and it would be supremely shitty to be her SO

IDerive 12

Thursday 30 July 2015 23:00

I like how in your profile you state that you hate when people give advice on FML and then you give advice on FML... You keep cantankerous old goats like me confused

IDerive 12

Thursday 30 July 2015 23:02

Had you used the term "ass" instead of "horse", you would have got thumbed up, because everybody relates to asses in at least 3 ways.

pjsr 32

Friday 31 July 2015 6:26

Maybe I should have clarified, 'giving advice to the OP'. In this case, that would be saying something like, 'just pretend you meant to do it and continue your laundry', as if the OP is bent over waiting for someone to tell her what to do.