By Anonymous - 29/07/2009 15:18 - United States
The Top
Upfront
By kalisa anteater - 09/06/2013 20:49 - New Zealand - Auckland
By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 09:04 - Australia - Adelaide
Money money money
By hmmm - 01/10/2013 12:32 - United Kingdom - Leicester
By HeShe - 06/09/2009 17:10 - United States
By itwasalongnight - 02/02/2014 11:32
itwasalongnight tells us more.
By harrington61 - 19/05/2013 21:27 - United States - Midland
By Anonymous - 29/05/2013 15:21 - United States
Maturity
By merkris - 29/06/2009 15:41 - United States
By Intheway - 29/08/2009 20:42 - United States
Hot wheels
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States
By Unknown - 07/07/2011 15:12 - United States
By greenchan - 25/02/2011 05:12 - United States
Migraine-inducing FML
By myheadhurts - 21/06/2009 07:09 - United States
By Faithful - 24/11/2011 10:01 - Singapore
By GMD - 18/09/2012 20:20 - United Kingdom - Belfast
By HomicidalPegasus - 25/05/2014 15:50 - United States - Bethalto
By Anonymous - 31/07/2009 21:05 - United States
By angryinlaws - 12/10/2013 07:23 - Canada - Toronto
By Anonymous - 30/04/2013 17:55 - United States - Hartford
Excuuuuuuuuse me!
By LadySteveMartin - 02/04/2013 00:18 - United States - Woonsocket
By Timmah - 31/08/2009 05:18 - United States
By Bouh - 27/12/2012 04:04 - France - Paris
By asthmatic - 18/06/2009 23:07 - United States
By Rachel - 02/02/2009 22:00 - United States
By fuck you walmart - 26/04/2013 22:03 - United States
By NRFTW - 17/12/2013 05:10 - United States - Denver
NRFTW tells us more.
A little more detail: This guy had wandered over from a party next door. It was almost 1 a.m., and during the holidays I work really late, so I came home, put my stuff away, and when I turned around there was a guy standing literally at my window, on my porch, pissing on my house. I walked out and started screaming at him (I know, probably not smart) to get the **** off of my property. He said, "I'm just takin' a leak," finished his business, zipped up his pants, and leaned against the porch staring at me. That's when my brain caught up with what I was doing and I went back inside and called the cops. My porch runs the length of my (very small) house. The porch is open without a railing, and at this time there were also several other men sitting on my porch right under my bedroom window (closest to my neighbors yard). When I called, Weld County dispatch first told me that the police were "too busy" to come out, and I ended up on the phone with a cop. He asked if the porch was fenced (no) and if it could be seen from the main road (no). I stupidly thought he was trying to locate my house, as it is hard to find. According to the laws in my city, once you ask someone to leave your property and they refuse, it is trespassing. I told them multiple times to leave my property, and one of them had the nerve to tell me "I can sit where ever I want."
Alpha male behavior
By Hotdamnthisismyjam - 16/06/2009 00:32 - Canada
By pumboc - 24/06/2013 05:38 - Australia - Glen Waverley
By Anonymous - 11/01/2014 18:52 - Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo
Keywords
OP here. First of all: Yay! It got published! Second to those who say I deserve it or should move: I own my condo, so not able to move at this point. I do not live in a flood zone or swamp. Both floods have been sewage backups from blockages at least 150 feet from my condo. The one 10 months ago happened while I was at work--that was a disaster. This time my neighbors flooded (badly) on both sides. Water from one neighbor came under our shared wall. Not too bad this time and I was able to get the clean out cap off outside right away so it flowed into my backyard instead of my house. Truly an awful experience to be sure. I thank my lucky stars that I opted to cancel my plans and stay home and watch a movie... Otherwise it would have been at least as bad as last time. I'll admit... I'm afraid to put that clean clean out cap back on!