By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 062
You deserved it 3 580
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Comments

CommenSense 0

Lol that's probably normal behaviour for him

10 8
Invasion976 6

Maybe at first, but you can really get to know people this way. ?

14 3
CryMoreFMLs 14

This is the stabdard greeting in Northeast Texas. What's so wierd about it?

16 30
Glitterhinoceros 14

awkward turtle

21 12
Keyman1212 14

What is this stabdard greeting you mention?? Sounds painful.

27 1
CryMoreFMLs 14

Standard*, sorry I have pudge fingers....

26 12
Keyman1212 14

Yeah but you said you had an iPhone, I just tried to spell standard as stabdard and my phone told me to go make **** on myself...

33 8
LaydiexSkull 3

Make **** on yourself? That sounds delicious

25 7
CryMoreFMLs 14

I don't use autocorrect, and I don't always catch my mistakes before I post, usually after I hit submit do I see them. I strive for perfect grammar, but alas I am human and my fingers mess up occasionally.

21 6
CryMoreFMLs 14

It's fine, I love people who correct me because it helps me better myself.

17 7
EvilPotato 14

Why is CryMoreFMLs and Keymans conversation thumbed down, it was very educational.

14 9
illmatic2 16

I sometimes thumb down the people who reply to the first comment just to get to the top of the page.

7 92
Keyman1212 14

85- I expect you to be thumbing down yourself any moment now...

27 6
EvilPotato 14

OP you should have taken your AK-47 out from under your hat and blew him away with a rat-at-at-tat, but you ran outta bullets and ran away. (starts humming the rest of ultimate showdown).

11 2
fakeaccountX 6

What happens in the men's room, stays in the men's room.

13 5
monkeebalz 0

I would have just shat all over his face

9 4
TheCylonmaster 3

Not as awkward when he then said "I just jizzed in ma pantz"

9 0
steadycreepin 5

162 it's called keep Austin weird for a reason

0 2
sloppyflow 1

Indeed awkward but it cracked me up and I don't know why

3 0
Mario_lib 6

Op should've kicked him in the face

0 0
BlAcKxJe5uS 6

You know your job sucks when John Madden gives play by play while your on the toilet... "And this little piece dropped here, and had it dropped here I would've made a smiley face."

2 0
TheTerenity 9

LOVE Your phone case, where'd you get it?

7 2
Georgieeporgiee 9

Creepy perverted weird dude...

1 0
Daralea 21

How does OP not being a woman make this better?

2 0
WinterBlue42 22

It doesn't. AT all. o.o

0 0
tylersign 11

I'd think kicking would be more effective in this situation.

38 0
Dink995 0

That's exactly what I had in mind. Perfect!

5 0
ant1078 7

I would have personally tried stomping on his face

9 1
HomeAl0ne 20

******** on him would have the appropriate response I think.

18 1
asoptavlo14 6

Or just letting him be.. Not like he was going to kill you or something, no need to break his face.

3 27
skata 4

136- no, no need to break it. just permanently deform

13 2
lilwaynerockz_fml 12

136-so you are perfectly fine with people staring at you as you shit?

11 1
asoptavlo14 6

156- no and I would never be, I'm Just saying no need to assault him

3 7
Error504 6

Yay! Let's play kick-a-creep! :D

1 1
UnicornPukePink 0

You should work somewhere less weird....

42 3
ipodlover1995 0

Who the heck taught him proper bathroom etiquette?

4 3
davidisbeast 12

I don't think it was a matter of him knowing bathroom ettiquite or not ....

0 0
LoveLife293 2

Yeah, then look at your picture you have.

8 0
construction 7

Yeah... Like dressing up as a children's cartoon character and eat kids

6 1
TheSnakeDoctor20 17

Was it pedo bear?

91 3
trollsemen 8

Only if the OP was between the ages of 0-18

4 3
TheSnakeDoctor20 17

I though 133 was a girl, until I stalked his profile....

12 2
ikickgingers 15

Did you hear a camera phone shutter sound? That always creeps me out in bathrooms.

42 2
everybodyluvsMEN 0

Firstly, please don't kick my kind :( Secondly, it's probably the unlocking sound on phones that you hear, not the camera sound

4 11
ikickgingers 15

I don't kick all gingers. A lot of them are ridiculously attractive. And sadly no, I went to the movies with my brothers a few weeks back and heard the shutter sound when I walked in the ladies room and "my husband would be proud" was voiced. Oh god I just threw up a little.

12 1
everybodyluvsMEN 0

Hahaha that's messed the **** up!

0 1