Health, Accident and Work: The Curse

The Curse

By nancypants1124 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was joking around with my manager about faking an injury to collect Worker's Compensation. Then I actually slipped and sprained my foot, and now my manager thinks I'm lying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 981

You deserved it 12 713

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Same thing different taste

By seussical65 - 14/04/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 739

You deserved it 93 545

By klm878 - 13/11/2010 04:10 - United States

Today, at work, my manager fell in front of an entire lobby full of people on a wet floor. I'm the only one who burst out laughing. Turns out she has a broken arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 981

You deserved it 37 812

Fake it til you make it

By foreveralone15 - 24/06/2021 10:59

Today, I sprained an arm muscle while pretending to lift weights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 803

Bondage

By Anonymous - 14/10/2023 17:30 - United States

Today, my boss had a "team-building" event, which involved a game of trust falls. As I fell backwards, my coworkers failed to catch me, and I crumbled onto the floor. I'm now spending the afternoon in the ER with a sprained ankle, and my boss called to check if I still trust the team. Great bonding experience, guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 102

Head, meet wall

By Anonymous - 18/09/2019 20:00

Today, while joking and chatting with a coworker on my way to the bathroom, I misjudged the distance to the entrance and slammed my head into the wall. My coworker told everyone. So now I'm funny, but not for the reason I wanted to be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 288

You deserved it 371

By Anonymous - 21/04/2013 05:07 - United States

Today, in my rush to do my hair and get to work, I managed to trip over my dog, hit my eye on the counter, and sprain my ankle. I arrived at work with a black eye and a painful limp. My boss didn't care, and fired me for showing up late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 684

You deserved it 7 356

Be careful, please!

By WolfsScar - 08/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Lincoln

Today, while I was telling a friend she needs to be more careful about getting hurt, I dislocated and sprained my thumb. She then laughed at me and said, "Yes, I will." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 476

You deserved it 553

By babygirllxo - 13/07/2010 18:28 - Canada

Today, I slipped on the wet floor at work and sprained my wrist badly. I was carrying the wet floor sign so no one would slip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 536

You deserved it 7 168

By Slipperywhenwet - 20/01/2017 10:00

Today, I tripped over a "Caution: Slippery When Wet" floor sign and sprained my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 508

You deserved it 2 006

I can't take it anymore

By genn - 23/05/2023 18:00

Today, I called into work because I was too tired to keep my eyes open. My boss berated me over the phone, saying I should be more like that other employee who came in with a broken toe. That was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 833

You deserved it 113

garf3265 12

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:31

classic boy who cried wolf

gosh_mate 30

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:35

If it's real you can get a medical certificate, but YDI for joking about something like that to your boss

Comments

garf3265 12

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:31

classic boy who cried wolf

KK3137 31

Saturday 13 June 2015 15:48

So wait or run??

vikky538 28

Saturday 13 June 2015 22:35

This never gets old. Classic.

omgitsmoe 26

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:31

Don't joke around with your boss about an injury. EVER

Beyto7000 20

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:32

Just SOL man. Better contact HR.

MidnaLink 33

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:32

That's gotta suck, but YDI on this one.

gosh_mate 30

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:35

If it's real you can get a medical certificate, but YDI for joking about something like that to your boss

wordygirl 11

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:38

Tough luck! Spraining your foot and then putting your foot in your mouth! Never feels or tastes good.

Dick_diamond 22

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:39

Some things you just never joke about, especially at work and to a manager..

hushhh 4

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:40

Of course . I would think that you were lying too.

cooltatgar 31

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:44

Next time joke about getting a promotion.

xluciferx666 21

Saturday 13 June 2015 14:54

The universe can be a bitch sometimes good luck OP

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 596

You deserved it 3 438

Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 760

You deserved it 250 852

The Top

Today, I went to a job interview super early and giddy with enthusiasm. While waiting in the lobby, I struck up a friendly conversation with a bloke who was also waiting around in a suit. I jokingly told him, “Good luck mate, but I’m getting this job.” Turns out he was the hiring manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 147

You deserved it 529

Today, I just let out all my feeling for a woman that I have loved for 22 years. When I finished, she said "You're so funny!" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 648

You deserved it 6 433

Today, my anxiety and depression were so bad that when I went to the post office and failed three times to parallel park, I promptly burst into tears, apologized, and drove off when a very nice lady offered to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 183

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 983

You deserved it 5 274

Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 596

You deserved it 17 309

Today, my girlfriend, who recently started French classes, and I were having sex. Knowing how whispering in my ear turns me on, she whispered something in French, and I came. Later I found out it meant something like, "You should lose a lot of weight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 610

You deserved it 9 063

The Curse

Same thing different taste

Fake it til you make it

Bondage

Head, meet wall

Be careful, please!

I can't take it anymore

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