Health, Awkward and Haircut: Assumptions - FML

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 02/11/2009 17:48 - United States

Today, I went to get a haircut. The hairdresser at the counter was kind of cute, so I had to say something non-standard. When she greeted me with her hello, I replied, "Guess what I need from you today?" She looked at me, considered, and replied, "An eyebrow wax?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 461

You deserved it 39 946

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Same thing different taste

By LoserOfTheYear - 09/11/2009 22:27 - United States

Today, I went to have my eyebrows waxed for the first time. After signing in the receptionist looked at me and said "Lip wax?". I told her no, my eyebrows. She sat me down and the waxer walked up, took one look at me and said "Lip wax?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 121

You deserved it 10 037

By Anonymous - 07/01/2010 14:45 - Canada

Today, I got a haircut, and after thanking the stylist I went up front to pay. The lady behind the counter took one look at me, smiled, and said, "Well, now you'll need a hat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 087

You deserved it 2 719

By Craig - 17/02/2010 06:30 - Canada

Today, I went to my hair dresser to get my haircut. When she asked me what I wanted, I told her "the usual". She confused me with another customer and gave me a mullet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 464

You deserved it 33 064

By RR - 11/07/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 494

You deserved it 9 976

By blondessdoll - 04/05/2016 17:30 - United States

Today, when getting my eyebrows waxed, the lady cursed "oh shit!" under her breath, right after waxing half of my brow off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 832

You deserved it 1 111

By theboywithlonghair - 09/09/2009 04:24 - United States

Today, I decided to go get my hair cut because it was getting a bit long. I told the lady that I wanted it way short and she replied "Why? You will look like a guy sweetie." I am a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 992

You deserved it 6 897

By BaMiTsAnYa - 16/09/2013 01:21 - United States - Orlando

Today, as I was getting my nails done at a salon, the owner pulled my head back against the chair in front of all the customers and began to tweeze my eyebrows. When I exclaimed that I didn't pay for that service, she replied, "I don't care. This needs done." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 186

You deserved it 12 879

Halved

By Anonymous - 04/09/2019 14:00

Today, I went to the hair salon to get a fresh trim before receiving my master's diploma. The hairdresser managed to shave off half my eyebrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 634

You deserved it 119

Bad hair day

By Noname - 30/01/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, I went to get a haircut and the first thing the lady asked was, "So, do you want to keep the mullet?" What mullet?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 551

You deserved it 5 031

How're you doing?

By figcurzyez - 23/05/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, the checkout guy at my local store asked me if I had my hair cut. I answered and started talking about my hair, and he gave me a really weird look. He was talking to his friend, who I hadn't noticed in the queue behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 019

You deserved it 2 340

Next

Top comments

perdix 29

Monday 2 November 2009 20:22

Were you expecting "*******?" Hey, she just spotted an obvious problem and suggested an easy fix.

LoveDemon 19

Monday 2 November 2009 20:09

try getting a better pick-up line next time ...

Comments

maddieclaire 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 6:44

hahaha, OP that's horrible. but soo funny(:

ilaughatyourprob_fml 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 6:47

dude you brought that one on urself

TheNicce01 14

Tuesday 30 September 2014 22:22

you shouldv said to that. no i need to wax youre vag with my penis

whitetiger13131 26

Thursday 9 April 2015 7:11

you literally asked for it, buddy

cIouds 15

Sunday 3 January 2016 3:56

I'm actually curious of what you were planning to say.

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 86

Today, on my first day as a community support officer, a 7-foot meathead in the middle of a domestic argument told me to “piss off shorty”, and when I asked him not to swear at me, he picked me up one-handed and threw me in a builder's skip full of mud and wet cement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 351

The Top

Today, I came home very tired from a bad day at work, and really just wanted to relax on the couch for a while. My cat jumped into my lap, wanting affection. I was petting him, thanking him for his emotional support. He reciprocated by noxiously farting in my face and running away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 180

Today, I'd thought that I'd found the new love of my life. She wanted me, I wanted her, we were compatible on so many levels. I have known her for 15 years, and she had asked me on a date. Last night, she unfriended, blocked, and ghosted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 582

You deserved it 120

Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 048

You deserved it 1 962

Today my mother, who was once shocked to realise that my older sister was having unmarried sex, told me to go and 'get some' because it's good for my health. I'm asexual. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 194

You deserved it 375

Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my roommate to chip in for electricity costs. She called me a bitch, proceeded to tell me she can't afford it despite working full time and I part time, and blocked me on all communications. Uhm, what ? FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 256

You deserved it 349

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 039

You deserved it 3 262