Animals: Bad boy

Bad boy

By Coldandshoeless - 08/01/2013 10:40 - United States - Hackettstown

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 304

You deserved it 6 440

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Same thing different taste

By Devin - 21/06/2019 22:17

Today, my dog chewed through his leash, so I had to take him inside to prevent him from running off. I went to bed. I woke up to torn-up blinds, half-ate sandals, and a very, very anxious cat due to my dog running after her and trying to sniff her butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 434

You deserved it 725

By dBLIZZARD - 09/06/2015 18:39 - United States

Today, my dog ran away. I looked for him for 5 hours, and when I came back home, he was waiting for me at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 038

You deserved it 4 034

How can I stay mad at you?

By Anonymous - 28/03/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my dog had chewed up my brand new, expensive pair of shoes. I was so angry that I yelled at him and he cowered in fear. But then, as I looked at his sad little face, it dawned on me that I was the one in the wrong for getting so upset over something materialistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252

You deserved it 958

By Anonymous - 23/04/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 103

You deserved it 4 176

By GotMyBitchBack - 05/09/2013 11:02 - United States - Zanesville

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 522

You deserved it 3 047

By poorhamster - 23/10/2010 06:22 - United States

Today, I found my pet hamster that escaped yesterday, wet and soggy, next to my pet dog. My dog chewed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 069

You deserved it 3 924

Poker face

By therealducktape - 20/08/2010 22:03 - France

Today, I got back from a two-week holiday only to discover my dog missing. After looking for him at animal shelters and putting up missing pet signs, my roommate admitted he lost him in a game of drunk poker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 899

You deserved it 3 541

By Peta2nNoMore - 04/07/2009 10:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home and found a few of my faux fur coats completely butchered. On my way to interrogate my boys, the only ones home, I found our husky dog, who was recently shaved for an operation, covered in the fur that once belonged to my coat. My boys said 'he was cold'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 597

You deserved it 10 410

By Jen - 11/02/2011 09:02

Today, I opened my car door on reaching destination and my dog escaped. I never found him. My destination was the vet's office to get him micro-chipped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 900

You deserved it 6 351

By Loveless - 05/06/2011 12:23 - Canada

Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 527

You deserved it 8 211

shorty6823 28

Tuesday 8 January 2013 16:24

Probably hiding. I know my dog hides under our recliner and hides stuff she knows she shouldn't have taken, like a shoe.

perdix 29

Tuesday 8 January 2013 16:25

These are the times that try men's soles!

Comments

rivaraven 35

Wednesday 9 January 2013 0:18

So... you rather go on the streets than search the house first?

GayMatt 22

Wednesday 9 January 2013 0:23

you got some workout and the dog had fun.:)

alwaysbored13 14

Wednesday 9 January 2013 1:15

At least you know he's safe.

toblasc0sauce 5

Wednesday 9 January 2013 1:26

...found him! ;)

4ugu4 7

Wednesday 9 January 2013 3:26

Woah, Noor never gets thumbed down.

RinaRina 9

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:35

Just be happy he was okay :) i know it sucks! But a shoe is replace able. A dog is not, at least not in my opinion :)

Xotoolyxo 16

Wednesday 9 January 2013 4:48

Silly dog, check all over the house better next time

linnie_wesker 20

Wednesday 9 January 2013 5:20

Why would you leave your dog home alone wearing a muzzle? How can he drink water? What if it got caught on something?

moonwing 17

Wednesday 9 January 2013 6:25

Muzzle is another name for mouth when talking about dogs...

janro72 10

Wednesday 9 January 2013 6:04

you spent AGES? how old are you?

acciotardis 9

Wednesday 9 January 2013 8:54

At least he's safe :-)

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The Top

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 673

You deserved it 5 887

Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 254

You deserved it 17 460

The Top

Today, I dropped a ring in the toilet. The new engagement ring my fiancé gave me at dinner last night. The dinner that gave me diarrhea today. In which I dropped the ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 065

You deserved it 492

Today, I taught a kid piano for a two hour lesson. The mom left to do some errands, and by the time two hours was up, she texted me asking to watch the kid for another "15 minutes" while she returned home. No problem, she had the money too, so I stayed. Four hours later, she showed up, and refused to pay me extra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 121

Today, while vainly running a comb through my balding hair, I noticed a hair sticking out of my nose. I yanked it out, and the pain made me tear up a little. It was an inch long. I'm 24 and beginning to have more hair in my nose than on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 626

You deserved it 2 952

Today, I was working at a retirement center, when an old woman came to me and asked if I would like her old clothes. I politely said, "I'm sorry, but I'm a guy." She then said, "You could have just said no, instead of rudely lying to me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 845

You deserved it 4 500

Today, after having a hard week, I decided to order a pizza with an expensive milkshake. It slipped out of my hand in front of the lift. It went everywhere. I had nothing on me to clean it up with. Now I’m milkshakeless, down £5, and accidentally responsible for littering my accommodation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 165

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 013

You deserved it 28 751

Bad boy

Same thing different taste

How can I stay mad at you?

Poker face

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