Sex, Porn and Intimacy: Billy Crystal like you've never seen him before

Billy Crystal like you've never seen him before

By Anonymous - 05/01/2014 23:48 - United States - Cuyahoga Falls

Today, I downloaded a movie for my mom that she really likes, "When Harry Met Sally". When she loaded the file, we soon found out it was actually some kind of obscure porno billed as "When Harry Wet Sally". FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 719

You deserved it 9 926

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/01/2015 21:15 - United States - Chicago

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 453

You deserved it 6 157

By Allabouttheporn - 22/12/2016 00:05

Today, at dinner, I was talking to my parents about a movie quote. I couldn't remember what movie it was from. Then I remembered. It was a porno. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 995

You deserved it 3 318

By Broly171 - 01/10/2009 19:46 - United States

Today, I lent my parents a copy of "The Dark Knight", saying it was one of my favorite movies so they needed to watch it. A bit later my mom called... Apparently my roommate wanted to watch it as well, but couldn't find the case to his porno and decided to just use the Batman case instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 316

You deserved it 5 645

By identitychangeplease - 19/09/2012 20:41 - Sweden - Nyn?shamn

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 609

You deserved it 3 696

Not coming out

By HidenSeek - 08/05/2009 01:39 - United States

Today, my mom and I were watching this movie in which some girls start making out. My mother called them "sinners" claiming they'll "burn in hell twice". Then she said, "God doesn't like gays." I'm a lesbian. I picked out this movie as a way of coming out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109 050

You deserved it 17 106

Alone time

By Anonymous - 21/10/2015 12:12 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, as I snuck downstairs for a midnight movie, I witnessed my dad "polishing his wand" to Harry Potter porn in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 960

You deserved it 3 773

Now watching

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 23:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 785

You deserved it 32 358

By Nessa - 10/05/2017 15:00 - United States - Pomona

Today, my mom got out a camcorder she's had a while, saying that there were tapes of me from when I was a child. The first tape I put in was a porno starring her and her ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 701

You deserved it 551

By monty - 09/03/2009 02:53 - United States

Today, I was babysitting for my mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 364

You deserved it 13 428

By Tiana - 29/01/2012 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 355

You deserved it 9 268

starw0lf 31

Monday 6 January 2014 9:37

I can just imagine the "I'll have what she's having" restaurant scene!

ThatOneDrummer 8

Monday 6 January 2014 9:39

You should probably read things more carefully before downloading them.

Comments

aine500 16

Monday 6 January 2014 11:33

Did she watch it....?

Enslaved 36

Monday 6 January 2014 12:49

Don't forget to download dad's favourite-- Ace Ventura: Pet My Erection

razi1 20

Monday 6 January 2014 13:02

Aww that sucks

brandoneyez1 25

Monday 6 January 2014 13:08

This is why downloading is illegal... Reason #2345

radwanov 14

Monday 6 January 2014 13:46

just shut it

Aspireworks 12

Tuesday 7 January 2014 0:14

I'm roughly 100% sure that has nothing to do with why it is illegal.

Cynical_1 26

Monday 6 January 2014 13:56

Hey...I've heard it's right up there with "Titty Slickers" and "Saving Ryan's Privates". So did she still watch it? lol

gabagabaheyu 10

Monday 6 January 2014 14:02

sounds like a good laugh...then later at night you sneak a peek at it while everyone is sleeping. just because youre curious.

fetchc4ts 7

Monday 6 January 2014 14:07

omg hahaha that's.. *fake coughs*

Slimma 20

Monday 6 January 2014 14:58

Should always at least preview beforehand. That way you know you got the right thing and its the whole movie.

stupidbox 9

Monday 6 January 2014 15:06

lol,that happened to me when I downloaded red riding hood except it was german porno,eew.

dumpless 13

Monday 6 January 2014 15:19

Did she like it?

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The Top

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 660

You deserved it 3 777

Today, I was on my way home from a friend's house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know I was on my way. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 074

You deserved it 6 726

The Top

Today, while lifeguarding, I received six prank phone calls on the official pool phone. When it rang again, I picked it up, told them to go fuck themselves, hung up, and then left the phone off the hook. A second later, my cellphone rang. It was my boss, telling me to get a sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 926

You deserved it 8 516

Today, I got my dick sucked. Unfortunately, it was by the vacuum nozzle my cousin stuck down my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 979

You deserved it 1 556

Today, while buying lottery tickets, I mixed up "jackpot" and "scratch off" and asked for "$10 worth of jackoffs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 553

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 182

You deserved it 12 526

Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 001

You deserved it 16 978

Today, my husband asked me for permission to have an affair with his hot secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 532

You deserved it 6 761