Health and Sports: Black Swan - FML

Black Swan

By Anonymous - 08/08/2009 22:17 - Australia

Today, I competed in a ballet competition and made the finals, while I was on stage awaiting the results, I sneezed really loudly and snot went flying all over the stage. When I went to accept my award the woman presenting it refused to shake my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 765

You deserved it 8 828

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Same thing different taste

Act three, scene one

By anon - 12/08/2024 14:00 - New Zealand

Today, I was performing in a community theater production. Right before my big scene, I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in, but it came out with such force that I lost my balance, fell off the stage, and landed in the lap of the mayor, who was in the front row. My character’s dramatic entrance was unforgettable for all the wrong reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 128

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 892

You deserved it 4 114

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 05/05/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 113

Memorable presentation

By paul - 02/02/2010 11:25 - France

Today, I had a big meeting. Halfway through my presentation, I sneezed, and continued talking. I get some weird looks from my co-workers, but I didn't understand what they meant. When I finished, I passed by my boss walking to my chair, and he gave me a handkerchief. Why? Snot was all over my tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 299

You deserved it 4 769

My fault

By Craig - 05/02/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, I was awarding medals to finalists in a school club. While putting one around someone's neck, I ended up poking a girl in the eye. She tried to be a trooper by continuing to walk across stage, but I guess her eyes got really watery because she missed the step and fell, breaking her ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 294

You deserved it 8 028

By sickly - 20/01/2011 05:47 - United States

Today, I came to school really sick because I had to take an important exam. After I finally finished, I accidentally sneezed on my answer sheet right before turning it in. The teacher refused to take it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 608

You deserved it 4 507

By gassy - 29/12/2012 09:32 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 495

You deserved it 4 634

By HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 286

You deserved it 7 776

By BoogieCandy. - 23/10/2009 08:56 - Canada

Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 435

You deserved it 8 585

New face

By Anonymous - 02/11/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 894

You deserved it 6 449

Next

Top comments

Lokizzle 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 2:11

Quite and achoovement. SEE WHAT I DID THERE?

DameGreyWulf 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 2:11

Aw, yuck. You sneezed EVERYWHERE... but not your hand (I guess?), so that was mean of her. Shoulda held your nose, maybe?

Comments

smile12321 0

Thursday 1 April 2010 5:33

:( but congratulations!!

Skimbap 0

Tuesday 8 June 2010 21:36

YDI for thinking of ballet as a competition

Isoldael 27

Wednesday 28 September 2011 0:14

Sneeze onto the inside of your arm, more hygenic :)

Katiedance5678 5

Saturday 11 February 2012 15:55

@9 I do, asshole.

youknowimright 5

Thursday 27 December 2012 0:20

YDI for wanting to spread your germs by shaking her hand

Troisaules 7

Tuesday 18 June 2013 17:28

Finally making ballet entertaining ! Jk lol

alphabitch 2

Thursday 26 December 2013 10:22

Forget ballet. Take classes for spelling and grammer. Run-on sentence much?

Imp_hat 1

Thursday 14 August 2014 15:02

At least you won..

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