Love: Classy guy

Classy guy

By NewlyDread - 06/02/2013 02:31 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 441

You deserved it 7 439

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/09/2016 14:50 - United Kingdom - Shepton Mallet

Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 693

You deserved it 1 974

Swoon

By anonymous - 14/03/2010 05:04 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to marry me. Since he doesn't know my ring size, he asked for me to find a ring that I liked, and he would buy it and propose. The only problem is that he won't spend more than 200 dollars on it. Oh, the generosity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 988

You deserved it 37 024

How can I put this…?

By jkl54 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States - Salem

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the mall. We were looking at jewellery in Zales and she came across the engagement rings. She looks at one and says, "Are you kidding me? That ring is hideous and it's the most expensive one here! Who the fuck would buy that?" Well, that would be me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 323

You deserved it 6 707

By badluck - 21/07/2014 19:31 - Canada - Medicine Hat

Today, I was out with my boyfriend, when he started browsing wedding rings. He found a ring, proposed to me right there in front of a crowd, and then was promptly denied a payment plan. We left without a ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 398

You deserved it 5 752

By whatsername92 - 01/02/2013 03:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me the most beautiful diamond ring I have ever seen. As I excitedly put it on my finger, he told me it wasn't an engagement ring, but I should wear it like one to keep other men away and seem "unapproachable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 546

You deserved it 4 560

By Loved - 25/05/2019 16:15

Today, my boyfriend bought me an engagement ring. It turned out to be the wrong size and we had to return it, since the store said it couldn't be re-sized. As we headed home, I felt guilty, so I turned to him and apologized. His response? "It's OK honey, I didn't really want to marry you that much anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 613

You deserved it 211

By arthise - 09/10/2013 07:03 - United States - Evansville

Today, my boyfriend won a diamond engagement ring through a citywide competition. Instead of proposing to me, he's selling it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 034

You deserved it 17 198

By undanya__four - 10/04/2015 20:19 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, my boyfriend told me he's prepared to commit to marriage, but only if I buy my own ring and tell everyone he surprised me with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 188

You deserved it 3 694

For better, for worse

By limegreengiraffe - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Lubbock

Today, my boyfriend and I went shopping for an engagement ring. We ended up breaking up in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 857

You deserved it 7 466

By dino0123 - 12/12/2012 17:51 - United States - Herndon

Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 460

You deserved it 4 502

bornaunicorn 12

Wednesday 6 February 2013 9:01

You are one lucky lady!

chelsearenaeee 16

Wednesday 6 February 2013 9:03

She clearly gets the D

Comments

myusername23 17

Wednesday 6 February 2013 14:10

That is ******* funny as

Gfm1210 0

Wednesday 6 February 2013 15:18

Lmao at least he's hanging LOL

RedPillSucks 31

Wednesday 6 February 2013 15:52

Well, who wants to whip it out only to be told "sorry dawg, you only get a 2% discount for that" *shuffles back to corner and cries*

RedPillSucks 31

Wednesday 6 February 2013 15:56

I'm wondering if the real FML is based on OPs user name and the honeymoon expectation? If he's telling the truth, OUCH! If he's lying, DAMN!!!

sugarbear0727 19

Wednesday 6 February 2013 16:14

Lmfao. That's hilarious. It sucks that you were embarrassed, but he made a good point.

AliveLikeFire 7

Thursday 7 February 2013 1:18

A rather inaccurate one.

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 6 February 2013 16:36

IMO, men with small penises act like the biggest assholes vs the nice guys. A big diamond ring just means you have more money, not a small penis.

friedbunnies 9

Wednesday 6 February 2013 16:41

You're sure you want this forever? Divorce is messy and expensive, and they only get worse with time.

BreezZz 3

Wednesday 6 February 2013 17:43

Like a BOSS

liesseling 13

Wednesday 6 February 2013 17:45

I want a bf like this.

DDCA 24

Thursday 7 February 2013 15:16

With lips like those, I want a girlfriend like you!

mrebeccan 19

Wednesday 6 February 2013 18:03

Dude! your boyfriend is hilarious... it was a joke right ?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 242

You deserved it 6 977

Today, I had awesome sex with my ex. Again. I broke up with her a few weeks ago as she admittedly hadn't been attracted to me anymore in a long time. Now she says that after we broke up she doesn't feel any pressure anymore, and can enjoy sex with me again like she did before she moved in with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 199

The Top

Today, my car is being repaired, so I had to catch a bus to work. When the bus came, the driver pulled toward the curb and gunned it through a large puddle of water, then pulled away and continued down the road, leaving me soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 032

You deserved it 1 575

Today, I watched my boyfriend pick all the dead skin off of his feet. And then fling it at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 238

You deserved it 6 531

Today, my toddler is starting to realize when she has a dirty diaper. How do I know? She walked up to me with a shit covered hand, saying "Poop Mommy! Poop!!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 371

You deserved it 406

Today, my mom got a new furnace put in because they found out the old one was leaking carbon monoxide. This is six months after I got kicked out because I was sleeping too much, so my mom thought I was using drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 92

Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 348

You deserved it 2 961

Today, I slipped and fell while shopping at a local grocery store. I slipped and fell in the same store last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 041

You deserved it 758