Health, Annoying, Snow and Cold weather: Covid nostalgia - FML

Covid nostalgia

By Covid 2: Electric Boogaloo - 25/11/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I have to use toilet paper as a substitute for Kleenex, because I have a nasty cold and ran out. We're also snowed in where I live, so I currently can't go to the store to get some more. I think I now understand why people were hoarding this stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 22

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Same thing different taste

Shit for brains

By Anonymous - 31/10/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 182

You deserved it 653

We've all done it

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 04:00

Today, I was in the bathroom at the mall and the toilet paper had ran out. I had to use the socks I'd just bought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 224

By no tp - 15/02/2012 01:26 - United States

Today, I forgot to grab toilet paper on the way home from work. Since I don't have a car and all of my friends have plans for Valentine's Day I'm now down to wiping with cotton balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 795

You deserved it 8 331

By Anonymous - 03/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, the midwest blizzard hit my town, burying the roads in snow. All the local stores are closed. I'm not only currently on my period, but I'm out of pads and toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 492

You deserved it 10 487

Panic! At the Costco

By abutorac951 - 16/03/2020 16:48

Today, I had to drive over an hour away to buy toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 698

You deserved it 193

Autopilot

By TuteBananaCupcake - 29/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I used the last of the toilet paper to blow my nose while taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 571

Mix up

By luckygirl - 06/06/2019 12:09

Today, I have a bad cold, so I've been carrying tissues around with me. I noticed our puppy had pooped on the floor, so I grabbed a napkin and cleaned it up, then threw it away. I then blew my nose with my tissue. Apparently, I threw away my tissue and used the napkin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 693

You deserved it 611

By CallmeEddie - 14/11/2013 16:44 - United States - Joliet

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 891

You deserved it 4 909

By lanikai610 - 26/10/2011 18:35 - United States

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks VapoRub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 384

You deserved it 7 615

By whinywiper - 25/05/2012 15:10 - Canada

Today, I realized that the reason there is no toilet paper in the house is because both my parents are too stubborn to be the one who goes out to buy more. It's been five days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 494

You deserved it 3 807

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Weddings Awkward Love My ex Jealousy Friends AITA Embarrassing Health Poopoo peepee Relatable Therapy Mental health Covid Argument Parenting Kids Thanksgiving Ironic Medication Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Money Work

The Top

Today, mid-sex, my wife told me to call her a nasty slut. I was kind of uncomfortable doing it, but I did it to make her horny. She started crying, because she didn’t realise how much it would hurt her feelings. Now I’m not sure if she’s mad at me or herself, but I’m scared either way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 739

You deserved it 280

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 356

You deserved it 4 298

The Top

Today, I told my boyfriend I was leaving him because he's cheating on me. He then told me he will die without me. When I said that I didn't care, he said 'OK. I'll kill myself!' and then held his breath in attempt to suffocate himself. I can't believe I dated this idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 259

You deserved it 15 036

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We were under the covers, and my little brother thought we were wrestling, so he got on top of the covers and started "wrestling" with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 364

You deserved it 34 395

Today, my sister stopped by to visit me with her pet bird in tow. She asked me to hold the animal while she went to the toilet, and put it on my shoulder. It promptly shat on my only clean shirt and tore away a good deal of skin from my hand when I tried to get it off me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 363

You deserved it 2 575

Today, I was at my grandma's funeral. While giving the eulogy, I accidentally mixed up "You will be missed" and "You won't be forgotten" and instead said "You won't be missed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 519

You deserved it 7 927

Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs the ring back to give to the right woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 867

You deserved it 3 904

Today I knocked on one of my roommate's door and asked her to stop vacuuming since it's was late. She started to record me and went on a tirade about how none of the girls there respect her. She has previously tried to push two girls down the stairs. Her lease isn't up for 4 more months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 108