Intimacy, Sex and Awkward: Take what you can get - FML

Take what you can get

By Trim for now - 22/01/2022 01:59

Spicy

Today, after months of getting shockingly more action from my girlfriend then at any point in our last 6 months together, I found out I’m getting more because she cut back on her formerly unmentioned husband’s “access.” Apparently, he refuses to lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 691

You deserved it 375

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Same thing different taste

Kinda sussy

By thanks babe - 26/05/2022 22:00

Spicy

Today, my husband returned from a 6-week business trip. During that time, I put myself on a very strict diet/exercise regimen so I could surprise him with a hefty weight loss. He took one look at me and demanded to know who I was fucking on the side. Yeah, because that’s the only reason I lost weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 115

You deserved it 225

By Anonymous - 26/12/2017 06:00

Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 262

You deserved it 421

Pound for pound

By Anonymous - 27/04/2021 14:01

Today, my girlfriend had a huge fight with me because while I'm trying to gain weight and she’s trying to lose some, I’ve still lost more weight than her. Not my fault my body’s natural preference is to drop pounds like they’re hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 139

Good guys

By Raquel - 14/12/2021 08:01

Spicy

Today, I found out my husband was having an affair with his coworker. When I had a talk with him about it, his response in all seriousness was, “Lose that weight that you didn’t have before and I’ll stop fucking her.” I’d gained weight giving birth to our first child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 117

You deserved it 362

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 08:07 - Australia - Boronia

Today, after supporting my girlfriend for over a year in her endeavour to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better, my now-slender girlfriend dumped me, because she's found someone "better" than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 466

You deserved it 4 345

By Anonymous - 28/02/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 472

You deserved it 1 650

Skin deep

By Anonymous - 07/11/2019 10:15 - Australia - Hornsby

Spicy

Today, I find out why my long term boyfriend hasn't been interested in sex for the last three months. It’s because I’m "fat." While I could probably lose a few, I'm not obese and I'm the one who's encouraging healthy eating and exercise in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 384

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 19:22 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 097

You deserved it 6 385

By notfatanymore - 13/11/2011 20:50 - Germany

Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 368

You deserved it 4 106

Bodyshaming king

By Anonymous - 19/03/2022 10:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, it's my sixth month of working out 5 days a week, watching what I eat while my family eats like kings, and only losing 2lbs. It's also the day husband said he misses my 20 year-old body and no longer finds me attractive, but that's okay because he "loves me anyways and it's good to know where we stand." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 137

You deserved it 168

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 22 January 2022 5:07

You ought to send him a bucket of chicken to say thanks. Anonymously, of course.

Comments

JackWood 20

Saturday 22 January 2022 4:09

It hurts but think of the bright side, now your free to get as much action anywhere you want.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 22 January 2022 5:07

You ought to send him a bucket of chicken to say thanks. Anonymously, of course.

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 33

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 111

The Top

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 326

You deserved it 2 244

Today, I found out that the same doctor who came over to run Covid tests on my family actually infected us with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 267

You deserved it 141

Today, my doctor told me the severe hearing damage from my car accident is permanent. I just graduated with a degree for Interpreting and Translating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 655

You deserved it 132

Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 102

You deserved it 8 575

Today, after several hours of trying to get my triplet daughters to go to bed, they finally fell asleep. Exhausted, I went to the bathroom so I could go to bed. Not thinking about it, I dropped the toilet seat down rather loudly and flushed the toilet. All three girls woke up crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 612

You deserved it 27 510

Today, I turned 18. I thought it was bad enough that I had to pick up my own ice cream cake from the store, but then when I got home, my family discovered no more room in the freezer. They decided to eat it so it wouldn't melt. Without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 480

You deserved it 3 341