Creepypasta, Stalker and Miscellaneous: Creeped out

Creeped out

By emoney - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 625

You deserved it 3 772

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Same thing different taste

I hate myself

By trixanne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 720

You deserved it 3 950

Not a morning person at the best of times

By shouldhavestayedinbed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 698

You deserved it 2 180

By Myriam - 18/06/2012 16:05 - Maldives - Male

Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 862

You deserved it 3 408

It's sus to us

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - New Orleans

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 436

You deserved it 4 496

The ending of Lost explained

By Morgan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 862

You deserved it 30 067

By paranoid neighborhood - 27/11/2013 17:51 - United States - Orlando

Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 352

You deserved it 4 227

Red flag

By Kirby - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought, "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot?" Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 204

You deserved it 4 509

WHO ARE YOU?

By Targeted - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Kirkland

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 188

You deserved it 2 893

BIKES?!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I rode my bike to work. Once there, I realized I'd forgotten my bike lock. For fear of it being stolen, I quickly rode home and took my car instead. When I later got home, I realized my bike was missing. Someone stole it from my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 714

You deserved it 6 307

By "ztodaro" - 30/06/2017 20:00

Today, while I was inside a store, I heard a crash. Of course I ignored it because my car was parked. I paid for my items and walked out to see this. Nobody else was around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 890

You deserved it 291

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:52

Get a (big) dog. Change your locks. Buy a shotgun.

lyndis_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:53

Well, you do. A golf ball at the door seemed less creepy than a note on your bedside table. Sorry if I scared you.

Comments

englishmuffin 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:43

maybe it wasn't meant for you? otherwise... creepy

kaytee05 0

Friday 16 April 2010 21:41

wow! u have a creeper on ur hands :(

MisterMuffinz 13

Wednesday 16 February 2011 17:49

sorry bout that, i just get so lonely sometimes... being a golf ball shagger isnt quite the job i was looking for, but i just need to get by.

HateMySister 6

Wednesday 30 October 2013 2:19

Creepy no matter who it's meant for.

yndigot 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:46

Uh ... is moving an option? Seriously creepy.

Moemoemoe_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:47

DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: EEK. Err, change locks? ^^;

anonymous100000 17

Thursday 6 November 2014 21:59

or how about OP takes this very seriously and contacts the police...stop playin.

TheLittlestNinja 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:48

GET A STUN GUN!!!

fmyluff 7

Sunday 10 March 2013 19:14

Or curtains.....

grazynaanka 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:49

Creeeeeeepy. Change your locks. Um wow. Very creepy.

applecake 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:49

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

cattturine 21

Friday 23 January 2015 16:21

What the hell is wrong with you?

Rooney101 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:50

I think maybe you should keep the curtains or blinds drawn more often

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:52

Get a (big) dog. Change your locks. Buy a shotgun.

lyndis_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:53

Well, you do. A golf ball at the door seemed less creepy than a note on your bedside table. Sorry if I scared you.

stosborn 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:54

... Really... this isn't even funny after high school... probably some kid.... in high school

Keywords

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 47 333

You deserved it 19 740

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 205

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 34 688

You deserved it 15 178

Today, I wore the belt that my stepfather has spent 2 months needle pointing, as a finishing touch he added my initials: 'fml'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 5 361

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I agree, your life sucks 56 056

You deserved it 7 428

Today, my mother warned me that if I ever have anal sex I will die. I'm 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 139

You deserved it 498

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I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 1 503

Today, after being a germaphobe for almost ten years and refusing to go out to restaurants because of it, I finally had the courage to face my fear, and went to dinner with my family. After three bites into my salad, I found a dead bug in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 178

You deserved it 3 413

Same thing different taste

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