Food, Delivery, Relatable and Thief: Dashed - FML

Dashed

By Anonymous - 12/07/2021 00:01

Today, my Doordash driver texted me to let me know my son had picked up the food I'd ordered. I don't have kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 72

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Same thing different taste

Mix up

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 08:01

Today, I ordered DoorDash to my home. I sat outside waiting for it, starving, when my husband came out, laughing at me. The DoorDasher had called, I'd accidently sent it to my work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 798

Mixup

By Anonymous - 06/11/2021 23:00

Today, I had to Doordash lunch, due to an important work meeting in another timezone running incredibly long. I was trying to play it cool but I was starving. Finally, I get the notification that the food had been dropped off. I looked at the picture: it was delivered to my house instead of my office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 453

Gig economy

By Doordean - 13/03/2023 12:00

Today, the dean of the university I go to delivered a DoorDash order to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 136

By Raiders4ever - 21/10/2009 00:44 - United States

Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 377

You deserved it 24 983

By nh-Amazon - 27/04/2014 23:01 - United States - Plano

Today, I asked my son to go to the grocery store across the street and pick up some lettuce. He sighed and said, "Why don't you just order it on Amazon?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 317

You deserved it 7 313

Did I teach you NOTHING?

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 00:00

Today, I ordered pizza for dinner and left cash by the door so my son could pay for it, in case it arrived before I got home. I told him they should get all the money, but I just found the tip. Apparently he thought I'd miscounted. I'm a server. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 188

By lol112 - 02/06/2012 12:47 - United States - Monroe Township

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 801

You deserved it 5 471

You have arrived at your destination

By Anonymous - 30/01/2023 10:00

Today, an Edible Arrangements driver knocked on my door with the most delicious-looking gift! He was just asking for directions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 126

Nice try, Karen

By munchkin77 - 15/12/2021 20:01

Today, as a pizza delivery driver, I delivered to a customer with young kids. She gave the pizzas to one of her kids to take inside, where the kid dropped them and it went everywhere. She then rang the store and claimed that I'd dropped the pizzas, then told her to "suck it up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 097

You deserved it 85

Keeping up appearances

By waterpistolriot - 23/10/2020 11:02 - Austria

Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464

You deserved it 855

Next

Top comments

EBrogen 12

Monday 12 July 2021 1:47

More like a problem for the door dash driver that will end up paying for it.

MidnaLink 33

Monday 12 July 2021 1:57

And now, for in the future, you'll know to arrange to have them speak to you directly. Just put it in the drop-off instructions in your address settings.

Comments

EBrogen 12

Monday 12 July 2021 1:47

More like a problem for the door dash driver that will end up paying for it.

MidnaLink 33

Monday 12 July 2021 1:57

And now, for in the future, you'll know to arrange to have them speak to you directly. Just put it in the drop-off instructions in your address settings.

Wadlaen 23

Monday 12 July 2021 13:35

You don't have any kids that you know about...😉

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, my daughter found a hair baked into the crust of her pizza. Grossed out, she put it down the garbage disposal, but I told her to dig it out so we could get a refund. After dinner, she came looking for the saved pizza crust. I was baffled about where it was until I realized I'd eaten it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 4 691

Today, I finally decided to tell my partner that I was sexually harassed by another guy in high school. When I got to the point, she rolled her eyes, stopped me and said, "Why can't you just tell me something nice? I don't want to hear about it, it's triggering me." Well, thanks for your attention, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 101

The Top

Today, I finally had a day off in two weeks and I was excited about getting to sleep in. At 5am, my mom came in and knocked loudly. When I asked her what she wanted, she said she was checking to see if I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 908

You deserved it 1 127

Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 408

You deserved it 409

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex yet, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite." Now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 828

You deserved it 5 007

Can you work out who dunnit?

I agree, your life sucks 516

You deserved it 155

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 614

You deserved it 2 726

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 300

You deserved it 34 574