Delusional

By Anonymous - 02/08/2012 00:56 - United Kingdom - March

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she never takes dumps. I told her that as long as she eats, it's a biological impossibility, but she seems to have genuinely deluded herself into thinking it's true, purely because she is a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 190
You deserved it 3 299
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Top comments

kimmi41509 10

What a moron. I know girls who fart, burp, and shit more than a man.

233 23
Yellow_Fish79 11

She's going to really hate motherhood someday.

163 4

Comments

Justicefrombelow 2

Taking dumps is not related to eating, e.g. if you stop eating, you'll continue producing feces. Your bodily functioning alone produces waste. I thought that was below high school biology level. At least in France it is.

3 26
AwsumShyGuy 12

What are they teaching you in High School then? Feces is whatever food the body doesn't take nutrition from.

4 1
Justicefrombelow 2

No. Feces is partly food, partly dead bacteria, and partly intestinal epithelial desquamation (to name the most important, you don't seem ready for anything too complete right now). The two latter having not much to do with whether you're eating or not. So it IS true then, you're just a bunch of creationists with NO IDEA how nature works.

0 5
Dnigz13 4

Don't complain if she doesn't take a dump and she's healthy lol look at the bright side you never have to unclog the toilet after she uses it or after she uses the bathroom you don't ever have to worry about the air being almost as deadly if not deadlier than mustard gas lol

2 6
Rhondaplp 11

Just go along with it, obviously she doesn't want you picturing her doing it.

9 4
Angelastic_fml 18

If she really used those words, it could just be that she misunderstood the slang expression 'to take a dump', to refer to some male-only bodily function, or some activity that she doesn't happen to do. Then it would just be another charming case of someone not finding out the real meaning of an expression until surprisingly late in life.

1 6
Levvy 22

That actually seems plausible, but I can't fathom what she might have misunderstood it to mean.

1 0
outoftown 26

#49, thank you. Ladies evacuate their bowels. They don't "take dumps."

1 1
dead_insects 18

so what does she call it when she sits on the toilet and emits solid waste?? Poor delusional thing...

6 1
geocayce 7

Wow, biologically impossible. Unless she's a mechanical breakthrough in cyborg technology. Otherwise, your girlfriend is an absolute schnook. Sorry, OP, but YDI. After all, you are the one dating her.

3 4
Ncbaby2012_fml 3

I feel like you two are running out of things to logically talk about. Just sayin

7 2