Double Impact

By Zoogangcapk - 01/01/2020 05:00

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is pregnant. The problem is that I don't know how to tell my wife... Who is also pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks 535
You deserved it 10 192

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Start with. "Honey, I'm a **** and you deserve better. Since I've been an arsehole and an irresponsible one at that, please take me to the cleaners through the divorce and child payments while you have a better life."

You’re disgusting. You don’t deserve a wife OR a girlfriend.

Comments

It’s only January 1 and we’ve already found the dumbass of the year!!

Fickle 6

People like you should see a proctologist more often. That way they can help you keep your head out of your ass. Two children suffer because of your ignorance.

You’re a terrible person for cheating on your wife. You deserve all the negative consequences that come with this.

biscuitjesus 6

To all the people saying he deserves a divorce, he deserves to die, etc. How do y’all know that he’s not in a poly relationship? 🤨

"The problem is that I don't know how to tell my wife... Who is also pregnant." If he was in a poly relationship, it wouldn't be a problem. In fact, in that scenario, it might have been planned to happen that way. Sister wives, and whatnot. As it is, Captain Douchebag has bitten off more than he can chew, deserves to lose both women, and suffer in eternal loneliness, while hemorrhaging money in the form of two child support payments each month.

If he were in an open or poly relationship, he wouldn't worry about telling his wife that not only has he been cheating on her, but that he's knocked up two women at once.

I don’t sympathize with you one bit. And I don’t blame your girlfriend, because I bet when you met her no doubt you told her you were single, right? Stay in your struggle.

Matthew Irmen 11

Congrats! Sounds like a hefty child support bill from both sides, but I’m guessing that you’ll be a deadbeat dad.

You never know; he could be a brilliant dad. Being a two-timer does not automatically remove you from the right to be in your children's lives. If he wants to be in his kids' lives and he's competent enough to look after them, then let him. Of course, custody arrangements might be a little awkward; should he have both the kids on the same days? On the one hand, it could be a little awkward, but on the other hand, they're siblings, so it would be nice that they saw each other.

YDI for cheating on your wife and not using protection.

Red Forman: Son, you don’t have bad luck. The reason bad things happen to you is because you’re a dumbass.

A child is the best gift you could receive life. He or she will need your love and money forever. Now you're being blessed with two bundles of joy. Your kids deserve better than you for a father. I got their mothers have the sense to ditch your cheating ass, and you have child support payments forever.

Whilst he deserves to lose both women and be forced to pay child support, I wouldn't bar him from seeing his children. For all we know, he could have really good paternal skills; plenty of cheating spouses are very good parents. As an example, I have a friend who is utterly appalling in relationships; he's cheated on multiple girlfriends and even has even admitted that he goes through women like some people go through tissues. Yeah, he's kind of an arse; something which he will gladly admit. Yet, to his two-year-old son (born from one of those flings), he is the best father a kid could ever ask for. I was surprised how well he took to fatherhood; he loves that kid with all his heart and would defend him to the death if necessary.