Annoying and Movies: Dude, STFU! - FML

Dude, STFU!

By Cyberdeeder - 13/10/2008 08:19

Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 131

You deserved it 20 269

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Shut up

By anon - 04/05/2009 21:56 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a theater waiting for the movie to start when a hot guy sat next to me. Trying to impress him, I made seemingly witty comments to my friend throughout the movie. When it ended, he loudly complained to his friends about the 'annoying girl' sitting next to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 765

You deserved it 105 081

Move!

By Mogg - 18/12/2009 08:42 - Australia

Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 015

You deserved it 3 272

By BC94 - 16/07/2012 04:21 - United States - Mcminnville

Today, I went to a movie with this guy. He was late so the only seats available were the ones in the very front which he refused to sit in. As we were looking for two seats, he spotted one near the back and sat down, leaving me to sit by myself in the front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 553

You deserved it 2 841

By anonymous - 17/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 035

You deserved it 2 528

By sheyo - 05/03/2009 01:13 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 506

You deserved it 315 127

By zaynemaliksvagina - 24/06/2015 17:10 - United States - Shrewsbury

Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 422

You deserved it 1 891

By that girl has a beard - 04/08/2015 07:33 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies. A really cute girl sat beside me. I tried to strike up a conversation with her until she turned to look at me and I realized he was a guy. I couldn't even finish the movie because I felt his judging eyes burn holes into me the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 736

You deserved it 6 761

By power corrupts... - 07/08/2011 20:29 - Czech Republic

Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 062

You deserved it 12 049

By Smirky - 13/02/2017 02:30 - India - Bangalore

Today, while walking down the aisle of a movie theatre, I passed gas so loudly that the audience missed the climax of the film laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 641

You deserved it 1 720

By drfeelgood93 - 04/08/2010 22:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the cinema with a girl I like. Knowing she has a bit of a soft spot for me, I was keen to sit in the back row. Too bad her sister tagged along, insisted that we sit somewhere else, and scolded me every time I so much looked at her. I ended up paying for the unwanted guest as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 884

You deserved it 5 060

Next

Top comments

JFLESH 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 7:08

I ******* hate people like that

SummerWind 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 21:40

God, what a dick! Hope you told him off, and that he never watches a movie again.

Comments

SummerWind 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 21:40

God, what a dick! Hope you told him off, and that he never watches a movie again.

beastmode21 0

Saturday 17 April 2010 6:46

ydi for not running away and hiding in your closet playing ispy with yourself

doo_da_doo 0

Thursday 29 April 2010 5:02

hate that

Snooopy_fml 5

Monday 17 May 2010 13:42

well people tend to laugj when theyenjoy somethinyg funny

symboisisi 2

Saturday 2 April 2011 9:09

had the same experience，hate it

SadinSherman 16

Friday 22 July 2011 3:37

That is a little harsh.

skitzofreniks 5

Tuesday 24 April 2012 19:49

I hate people like that!

JFLESH 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 7:08

I ******* hate people like that

cowgod 0

Monday 14 December 2009 7:58

yeah. a real fml is when the guy beside u is reading all the subtitles while ur watching a foreign movie that lasts 3 hours

BrickTamlandLamp 13

Wednesday 30 April 2014 17:38

Is this the first FML ever?

Zonedout 2

Monday 9 March 2009 15:48

I've done that XD I love making up call backs to horror movies the Halloween remake was hillarious! Yeah, I tried to control myself...but god sometimes you just can't.

bezach 0

Tuesday 9 March 2010 6:19

no no no noooo don't do that he has a knife agh I Warned ya...XD screaming ftw glad you enjoy it

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:18

IKR

JazzHandsFML 28

Thursday 9 April 2015 20:35

I hope both of you choke on your popcorn.

shabaloo 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 2:03

That sucks

aleeshttylXD 9

Tuesday 12 June 2012 20:59

uh yeah, i think it was obvious.

abyssion1337 0

Monday 23 March 2009 7:51

according to Shepard book he's going to go to a special part of hell

woutrr 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 19:05

Oh, it was you staring and "shhht"ing me all the time then. (x

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:21

xD

xMooMoox 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 17:53

Quick solution TELL THE THEATER WORKERS. Seriously it seems childish but I've had people play music. You don't mess with me when I really want to watch a movie! :)

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:24

I'd be scared going to a movie with your then o.O

Dark_Raven 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 0:56

Lol well that sounds like black people (btw I'm black so it's cool, lol). We do that.

woofootball09 0

Tuesday 6 July 2010 20:22

ya them damn niggers

ashlii13111 4

Monday 16 July 2012 6:20

Oh, I couldnt already tell

cakingjr 0

Friday 3 April 2009 5:10

Punch that ****** in the ******* throat.

lexilovesyou 0

Friday 19 June 2009 14:39

Yeah I know Lol! I was just going through the old ones. They are so lame!

lucy8248 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 19:22

Me too!

MukyDaCookie 0

Monday 6 April 2009 2:55

Punch him.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 096

You deserved it 1 169

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 23

The Top

Today, I went to have a sperm analysis done at the fertility clinic. I spent an hour trying to masturbate into a cup but I was too anxious and couldn't finish. There was a knock on the door. A clinician and a lab assistant both were there, wondering if I was OK. I have to go back next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 005

You deserved it 8 540

Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 277

You deserved it 3 807

Today, as every day for the past three weeks, I had to hear my housemate complain about an order being delayed. The last couple of orders took two months to arrive, and she decided to order yet again from that company, so she checks daily and I have to hear about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 138

Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a cute girl I didn't know. She fell asleep on my lap by accident and I just let her for the whole train ride. This is the closest I've ever been with a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 48

Today, I found out that while getting your hair cut, you should say "Yes" or "No", instead of nodding your head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 446

You deserved it 59 528

Today, I accidentally called a student in my 10th grade English class "David" instead of "Dylan". Without thinking, I said, "I'm sorry, I just have a lot of d's in my life!". All of my students broke out in mortified laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 985

You deserved it 1 098