Dating, First Dates and Love: First date, and probably the last

First date, and probably the last

By DrunkGirl - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 774

You deserved it 63 373

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Top comments

phanotomsea 0

Monday 19 October 2009 20:36

If you had an awesome date.. then why did you need to get super hammered? It's your own fault, so no I don't feel sorry for you.... just for him

Narzhul 0

Monday 19 October 2009 20:20

Man, I would love a super hammer-hand to punch my dates with.

Comments

moonlight_daze 8

Tuesday 14 September 2010 18:26

That'll teach him for being awesome!

bsgirls 0

Friday 25 February 2011 4:41

yes thx for asking

kkm15 1

Saturday 9 July 2011 1:49

was it a hammer punch

hateevryone 14

Sunday 17 July 2011 23:53

there goes that second date

atishe24 9

Wednesday 18 January 2012 14:18

I swear i read an FML about a guy that went out with a girl and got punched by his hammered date! :O

jc95sd 3

Thursday 4 October 2012 6:15

Sexy!

Zottenpedj 21

Wednesday 3 April 2013 18:19

i once did the same with a girl, and she still liked me

SirDirtyRedD 15

Friday 22 November 2013 0:51

anyone else think that FML shes talkin bout was secretly an lol

Pinkraincoat 18

Wednesday 26 March 2014 6:08

Have you not heard of self control?

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 63

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 189

You deserved it 11 246

The Top

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line told me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I had a headache, my legs were stiff, and my date must've thought I stood her up. The tech finally arrived, pries the door open, then rudely asked, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 466

You deserved it 3 586

Today, my boyfriend decided that a good time to have our first kiss was on a roller-coaster, right before a huge drop. He bit through my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 915

You deserved it 5 883

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 430

You deserved it 6 700

Today, a man came up to me and asked for a $50 bill in change. Being a good man, I said sure. I gave him the change and he gave me the $50 bill. After walking into Starbucks to buy a coffee, I handed the cashier my $50 bill. She called the cops. It was counterfeit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 891

You deserved it 23 525

Today, me and my boyfriend decided to have some fun in my room before my parents got home. My phone started vibrating half-way through, and when I saw my mom's picture, I reflexively answered. It wasn't a phone call. It was a FaceTime. Busted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 659

You deserved it 54 153

Today, my daughter found a hair baked into the crust of her pizza. Grossed out, she put it down the garbage disposal, but I told her to dig it out so we could get a refund. After dinner, she came looking for the saved pizza crust. I was baffled about where it was until I realized I'd eaten it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 4 692