Awkward, Thief and Money: Great timing

Great timing

By alo1434 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 010

You deserved it 3 372

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 450

You deserved it 3 684

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 16:09 - Guatemala

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 119

You deserved it 3 177

Adding annoyance to almost injury

By Anon - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, while I was walking to my car, I was mugged. Not only did they take my phone, wallet and watch, the extra few minutes taken in my journey meant that when I got to my car, I was given a parking ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 778

You deserved it 2 828

By sorrystupid - 02/06/2015 07:42 - United States

Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 482

You deserved it 5 296

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 04:04 - United States

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 608

You deserved it 3 719

By pooraf - 04/08/2016 14:42 - United States - Urbana

Today, I got mugged. I almost felt sorry for him: he got a $15 cell phone, a frozen debit card, a credit card with only $50 of credit left on it, and no cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 358

You deserved it 1 618

By americanized - 22/11/2010 15:25 - Denmark

Today, I helped two people find the central station on my way home. As a thank you, they mugged me and stole my wallet and iPod Touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 022

You deserved it 4 146

By seriously though - 22/02/2014 05:48 - United States - Littleton

Today, I arrived at the airport only to find my suitcase was lost and my 3 weeks worth of clothes and supplies gone. All I had left was my wallet and carry ons. Upon leaving the airport I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 903

You deserved it 3 577

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

By irony, huh? - 20/10/2019 14:00

Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 393

You deserved it 109

By unluckysamaritan - 15/10/2016 08:51 - Sweden

Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on the subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 498

You deserved it 984

just_a_dude_ 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 18:54

should've answered it and said "oh thanks I almost forgot to give them my phone with the tracking device ".

Jbfu 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 18:55

damn telemarketers, do they ever call at the right time?

Comments

chelseaaababyyy 17

Sunday 17 July 2011 4:52

i would take off running.. if they didnt have weapons

Kate1453 6

Friday 29 July 2011 4:30

That really sucks ass haha i dont live without my phone :p

upsidedownfrownn 5

Thursday 15 December 2011 4:43

So they took that too huh. Haha

pownmaster 4

Wednesday 29 February 2012 19:46

People mugging women, wtf has our world come to…

tkooker 6

Saturday 4 August 2012 22:17

I dont get it

duck2854 4

Sunday 13 July 2014 22:03

Would have been funny if her ringtone was a police siren!

Keywords

Transportation Keys Cars Coffee Health Relatable Am I overreacting? Miscellaneous Sex Relationship advice I need your advice Love Bodyshaming Parents Awkward New year's day Kids Parenting Neighbours Cops School Weird Education Holidays Family Dating Lonely Tinder Nice Guys Christmas

The Top

Today, my boss is still refusing to fire my psychotic coworker, who's made it his mission to insult, annoy, bully and threaten me every day into making me quit. My boss is convinced the guy just has "assburger's" and that the company would get sued if we fired him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 004

You deserved it 3 498

Today, my daughter is such a greedy idiot. Her ex was voluntarily giving her over £1000 for the kid but she decided she wanted more, and dragged him to child support court. She’s now only getting about £500 and her ex, who formerly had a great relationship with her, now hates her guts. Idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 175

The Top

Today, I volunteered to tend bar at a friend's charity event. I was called incompetent and had a drink thrown at me for stirring a martini instead of shaking "like they do in James Bond". I've been tending bar for 30 years and have never had a drink thrown at me before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 773

You deserved it 334

Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 500

You deserved it 5 510

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 478

You deserved it 9 882

Today, I went to the gym and worked out with a trainer. While doing arm exercises he commented on how impressed he was with the size of my triceps. That really boosted my self-confidence, until he leaned in to feel them and said, "Oh, it's just fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 423

You deserved it 6 783

Today, I kissed my husband and said, "I love you." That's when our 5 year-old son said to my husband, "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 713

You deserved it 4 184

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 623

You deserved it 43 830

Great timing

Same thing different taste

Adding annoyance to almost injury

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

Top comments

Comments