Grooming

By Schaf_12 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Austria - Vienna

Today, I trimmed my beard. When I showed my wife, she said, "Yeah, but you still look like a serial killer." FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 412
You deserved it 5 279

Top comments

I tell this to all my victims right before I cut them open.

At least you aren't being compared to Sasquatch.

Comments

Appearances don't matter. It's the inside that counts!

I tell this to all my victims right before I cut them open.

Better than looking like a pedophile... Or wait.

^ you work in a beauty salon, and "victim" is the term you makeover artists use. Yeah that's definitely it.

What a kind way to end their lives! Comfort them than finish them!

And "cut them open" is making a comparison to what surgeons do, since both the work that you and they do is very difficult.

22cute 17

24 - of course! He could BE a serial killer and LOOK like Ted Bundy. 10 - it's "then" ...than is only used for comparisons. Op - don't expect to get laid

for a name like 22cute, you seem pretty bitter. Thank GOD the grammer police showed up on the internet. Make sure you move along to the other 20 million people that can not type worth a crap.

She married you, that means she likes how you look or she just likes your personality. Whatever it is she married you for a reason

37- my bad, I noticed my mistake but it was already too late so I left it there. :S hopefully it didn't spite you ;)

22cute 17

42- I have no idea what you think is bitter about any of those comments. On the other hand it's pretty clear what's bitter in yours. Only, not why?? Having a bad day, Honey?

At least you aren't being compared to Sasquatch.

22cute 17

Op - please trim some more or just shave. Geez

zuzupetalsYO 11
pandabear55 0

I'd much rather be compared to sasquach than a hockey player stupid enough to shoot gatorade in the opposite direction of his mouth.

This probably won't happen as we don't have any sasquach myths in austria...

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Well, at least you're not compared to Bigfoot! Damn, #3 beat me to it :P

Dr0reos 8

i would take that as a compliment. I mean jefferey dahmer was pretty sexy. *seductive cat-like meow*

morgann_believee 5

..do all serial killers have beards?

Yes. But not all bearded people are serial killers.

blcksocks 19

And not all killers are serial

blcksocks 19

Just like not all bearded are people... It's pretty simple actually lol

BunchieRules 31

11 - Santa Claus is proof of that... right? o.O

Yes, they are usually overweight with a big white shirt with food stains on it with big blue jeans with huge ass glasses and they are usually balding. And they also have a "creeper smile" But this describes an adverage pedo, I'm not sure about a cerial killer.

EnzaiFreak 1

No,#69, he tricks small children with promises of toys and happiness, then stuffs you into his burlap sack full of lies!You are then taken to the North Pole to be Santas sex slave. And that, my dear, is the true meaning of Christmas:)

bizarre_ftw 21

11 just keep on thinking that.... *creepy smile*

bizarre_ftw 21

69 - no 106 - brings a Whole new meaning to "santa's little helpers"

*thinks to myself* how do you guys know what they look like?..

At least your wife can see your handsome face she fell in love with!

Maybe she was in love with the beard.

Orrrrr.. Heres a good one.. What if she likes him for more than just appearance.. Shocking huuuhh? O_o

22cute 17

He didn't shave the beard off; he just trimmed it.

Does that mean she's into necrophilia? Cause if she thought that and still married you then.... But of course, she's just yanking your chain OP! Dont sweat it! But if she uses taxadermy and foreplay in the same sentence...run.

OP sounds like the Dating Site Murderer meme!

Mister_Triangle 21

**** that, beards are awesome!

22cute 17

Well, not to women, my friend. Or young kids...or babies. So I guess it's just you & your camping buddies. Lol And, of course, other rabbis

Drizzelhell 3

Harsh humor my fiance says that all the time. And i simply say well it gives guys lookin at sumthing to fear. Lol

jasonfawcett 2

u do look like a serial killer

TarieBoo 2

no..he looks cute. and you look like youre trying to flex waaay to hard in that photo

Maybe it's just me, but I think 15 løøks scared.

"Well, if I look the part, I may as well..." *distant screams*