Cops and Transportation: Hawkeye - FML

Hawkeye

By hatesurf - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Peru

Today, I was surfing. I saw a cop writing a ticket for my car, I swam as fast as I could to stop him, I got caught in a wave, and smashed onto the rocks. I ended up with a huge bleeding scratch on my back, a broken surfboard, and a note saying that I had a flat tire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 079

You deserved it 10 172

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

imkendra 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:18

You poor bastard.

Lou_Briccant 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 7:28

Who writes a note saying you have a flat tire? Wouldn't it be kinda obvious when you get to your car? It's like putting a note on a car saying "YOUR CAR IS BLUE. I WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THIS." I mean I get the friendly gesture and what not, but still. It seems like a visit from Captain Obvious.

Comments

Unstoppable15 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 20:43

haha suxs for you !

KristinaBieber 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 5:50

That sucks! Sorry!

vieeev 4

Tuesday 12 July 2011 19:23

at least your able to go surfing!

djjaxon2001 4

Saturday 8 October 2011 3:59

Oh that would ******* hurt get better if u arnt already kool I like feeling bad for people lol

valdancer99 0

Friday 11 November 2011 23:37

That sucks OP!???

kittySplash 0

Sunday 22 January 2012 5:58

Aww hope your ok and surf's up

TheThrasher_fml 0

Saturday 24 March 2012 12:31

odd occurance that a cop is being a good person. ive only met 1 like that

stevenmx86 7

Sunday 10 June 2012 1:18

Why were you "Trying to stop him" if it was a ticket anyway? A broken law is still broken if you're standing there bitching in his ear...

CammyGal 26

Monday 1 October 2012 7:13

What could you have said that would prevent you from getting the ticket anyway?

wellsomuch4 5

Thursday 6 December 2012 9:42

Atleast you didn't get to him and piss him off. Pissed cops are not fun...

6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Cats Animals Gross Poopoo peepee Smells Love Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Health Painful First Dates Christmas Work Music Social Media Grieving Anniversary Boredom Abuse Ironic Intimacy Drunk Alcohol Transportation AITA Am I overreacting? Parents Kids Gun control

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 460

You deserved it 2 166

Today, I was on my bed on top of my boyfriend when I lost my balance and fell. My father walked in the door to see what the noise was. I don't know what is more embarrassing, my father walking in, or him walking in and saying, "That's an expensive bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 653

You deserved it 10 594

The Top

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 023

You deserved it 11 439

Today, I was giving my boyfriend oral, and he got so into it that he grabbed my hair. Just as he was about to climax, he pulled my hair so hard that my extensions came out. I jerked back and hit my head on the wall behind me. He then came in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 354

You deserved it 576

Today, after surgery on my penis, I’m on drugs to prevent erections. My girlfriend now thinks it’s hilarious to walk around naked, bend over in front of me, and do other sexy stuff, because she knows I can’t do anything to her and it’s killing me. In three weeks, her ass is mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 245

Today, my leadership class was trying to decide who would run the kissing booth in our local carnival. Someone suggested me, to which the director replied, "We'd never make any profit with her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 889

You deserved it 3 068

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 669

You deserved it 6 031

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 474

You deserved it 8 535