Hello, goodbye

By Joey - 07/05/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived, she was standing in the parking lot. She handed me a footlong sub, said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML
I agree, your life sucks 96 155
You deserved it 5 243

Same thing different taste

Top comments

OUCHH!!! But hey, at least you got a footlong.... or maybe you don't and that's why she's leaving you? Think about it... All kidding set aside, FYL

Could have been worse. She could have ended things without giving you a turkey sandwich. And then where would you be!

Comments

Allord 0

I would have played it all cool and focused the conversation around the sandwich. "Ooooh, turkey. Did you get mayo?" "Uh...yeah." "I love mayo, the perfect condiment on the perfect sandwich. The only thing more perfect would be mustard." "Oh there's mustard on there too." "Really? Wow, that's fantastic. I love you, mustard." "I know, well I've gotta go" And then I'd calmly walk to the back of my truck, and come back with a tire iron, and savagely smash her face.

lamisscrown 0

DAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM she is smooth

O, that sux, at least know she cared enough to get you food first. Hold in there.

Wow! That must hurt. But at least she was straight up about it

LeCorsaire_fml 0

that's some cheap parting gift.

Maybe she's dumping you cuz you don't have a footlong? lol. Anyway that kinda ducks that you broke up with a sub...

Wow, ouch mate. But I've no doubt some women have broken it with they're husbands and been alot less considerate than to buy their ex a sandwich

Nanda_fml 0

Would have been HILARIOUS if he had also added "I hate turkey. FML" after the last bit.

Recusant 0

ROFL! Bet you cringe whenever you hear anything about "turkey," "footlong," "subways," or "eating fresh." She chose the metaphor for quitting you "cold turkey"! (Couldn't resist.)