I'm innocent!

By ostfae - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was told by this big guy from school that I needed to stop stalking his girlfriend, and stop following her home from school. She's my neighbor. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 207
You deserved it 2 334
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Top comments

aback 4

And she has way too high an opinion of herself.

70 0
allmidnighteyes 10

Tell him you're her neighbor and that you're hittin' that ass harder than a drunk driver every night Then punch him in the jeans

52 2

Comments

doglover100 28

I'd tell him. Have her explain too.

0 0
jregier89 7

Kick his knee backwards next time and when he goes to the ground grab him buy the hair and smash his face into the ground and then look up at his GF and tell her to find a new way home.

0 0
RichardPencil 30

I'm impressed! Most "stalkers" these days are poseurs who are half-assing it, but you are so true to your craft, you moved next door to your prey. Now, all you've got to do is slip some Soviet-era nerve agent to the big guy, and then you can pounce!

0 0
1known 30

And if she lives after you, tell him she’s stalking you.

0 0