Love, Embarrassing and Health: Impressive

Impressive

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, at the gym, I saw this really pretty girl. Trying to impress her, I started lifting with heavy weights. One of the weights slipped out of my hand. I then dropped the other one, trying to make it seem like it was on purpose. I dropped the weight on my phone. I squealed. She giggled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 783

You deserved it 88 183

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Cool moves, dude

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Sweden - Goteborg

Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I approached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 367

You deserved it 37 950

Ready, steady…

By dan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Reserved

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class that I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 682

You deserved it 9 189

No good deed…

By williebees - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Huntsville

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 919

You deserved it 2 520

Why would you do this?

By harrassment101 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her, so I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 561

You deserved it 57 399

Gym bro

By kaplwv116 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 066

You deserved it 41 248

The struggle

By lizi - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Saint Andrews

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 047

You deserved it 838

Caught off guard

By dooommage - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 385

You deserved it 15 361

Sirens

By yumx24 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at the local swimming pool, my friend and I noticed two cute guys had just arrived. When they jumped in, we immediately took off our tank tops and got in the opposite end. They looked over at us, then looked at each other, got out of the pool and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 114

You deserved it 16 197

Creeped out

By emoney - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 623

You deserved it 3 772

The left hand, the right hand

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I was out walking my dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could go get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling, another friend came by, and we talked for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone into the water instead of his stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 828

You deserved it 42 516

BoredOne 0

Monday 23 March 2009 16:13

She must have giggled because she was so impressed by your ability to squeal.

Fuck34 0

Monday 23 March 2009 16:13

Bad things happen when you show off. I'm surprised that's all that happened...it could have been worse.

Comments

polly87 0

Monday 23 March 2009 17:16

I giggled at your squeal too.

bluewatchmendong 0

Monday 23 March 2009 17:23

Why would you squeal?

deliciouskaek 1

Monday 23 March 2009 17:30

lol - sucks, huh? but i would have thought it was adorable. you should have smiled at her afterward.

save_me_08 0

Monday 23 March 2009 17:31

How old are you that you squealed?

nolubba1037 0

Monday 23 March 2009 17:42

now you make the move dumbshit and get that cuddy

cold_steel_13 0

Monday 23 March 2009 17:47

why was your phone on the ground in the first place.. their this wonderful invention called a locker or a pocket... also even if you dropped the other weight i wouldn't purposely drop another one its quite likely it would land on your foot

tigg4licious 0

Monday 23 March 2009 18:16

i find this so hilarious because of the squealing comment... hahahaha

kayronjm 0

Monday 23 March 2009 18:19

LOL, awesome. I can't believe you tried to show off with lifting weights. She'd be more impressed if you were cool enough not to care what others think and are just proud of who you are and that you take care of youself (rather than doing it for your ego). If she isn't however, she's automatically not worth your time. See? All this is too easy for words - why people make it more complicated than it is, is beyond me.

latuka 0

Monday 23 March 2009 18:29

I would've cracked my ass open laughing. god when guys try to impress, it normally makes them look like complete idiots. it amazes me that they never learn. and I completely agree with #29

dumbkid 0

Monday 23 March 2009 18:34

Who keeps their phone near them like that at the gym? I'm attached to my phone almost 24/7, even if I'm outside running, but when I'm at the gym, I part with it for an hour or so. And seriously, on the floor? Idiot... I hope you had insurance.