Love, Intimacy and Health: Is this the worst Netflix and chill ever?

Is this the worst Netflix and chill ever?

By Anonymous - 15/08/2018 06:00

Today, a guy I'd been seeing briefly came over for cocktails and a movie. The night ended with him vomiting in my bathroom and on my couch, using my toothbrush, then proceeding to tell me how big his ex-boyfriend's dick was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 999

You deserved it 523

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Same thing different taste

By red - 27/09/2012 11:37 - United States - Portland

Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 086

You deserved it 8 266

By sevenshotmovie - 21/09/2017 07:00 - United States - Sheffield

Today, I invited my boyfriend over to watch a movie with myself and a few friends. He got drunk, talked during the entire movie, fell into and broke my fan and then threw up all over my roommate's bathroom. He is still leaning over the toilet and my fan sounds like a woodpecker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 115

You deserved it 537

Queasy

By ohdeardarling - 14/06/2009 13:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house with a few people. I drank too much wine and later when everyone else had left I gave him head, deepthroating a little too enthusiastically, and puked all over his cock and bedsheets. Turns out, washing vomit out of your pubes kills the mood somewhat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 819

You deserved it 60 604

Classy

By dontask - 01/10/2010 01:55 - United States

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 851

You deserved it 4 428

By theRoomie - 02/11/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 820

You deserved it 2 839

Strategic

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 13:50 - South Africa

Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 764

You deserved it 95 436

Dodged some bullshit

By Anonymous - 23/05/2019 14:00

Today, I went to get drinks for the first time with a guy I'd been talking to. He drank 4 drinks in the span of 30 minutes, and fell asleep at the table. I went to the bathroom before getting the check, and I came back to find he'd thrown up all over our table. Needless to say, I left without saying a word to him and deleted his number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 131

You deserved it 182

Sick sex, dude

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 02:13 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 497

You deserved it 5 227

The Phone Call

By turnmyphoneoff - 24/09/2019 00:01

Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 955

You deserved it 215

By TCRII - 19/01/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 3 818

real life problems 26

Wednesday 15 August 2018 6:05

Sounds like you should have invited his ex instead, for a bigger experience

chosha_fml 26

Wednesday 15 August 2018 7:37

‘Netflix and spew’ just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

Comments

real life problems 26

Wednesday 15 August 2018 6:05

Sounds like you should have invited his ex instead, for a bigger experience

FishyFishy 12

Wednesday 15 August 2018 6:32

Just let him out, no trash can or bag. HE MUST SUFFER!

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 15 August 2018 7:23

Cocktails? Whose **** in whose tail? What happened in the beginning and middle of the evening?

chosha_fml 26

Wednesday 15 August 2018 7:37

‘Netflix and spew’ just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

boopingsnoot 24

Wednesday 15 August 2018 21:36

“Hulu and spew” works better

Madrias 36

Wednesday 15 August 2018 9:42

Party Foul!

DMA 11

Wednesday 15 August 2018 14:31

Don’t leave us in suspense, OP! How big was his ex’s dick?!

Zekfen 17

Wednesday 15 August 2018 15:50

Maybe he was still suffering from the migraines his ex boyfriend gave him every time he orgasmed.

booboo300 15

Thursday 16 August 2018 2:42

Cocktails? More like **** tales.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 19 August 2018 7:35

And you didn't kick him out because...?

KingAdrock 16

Friday 26 October 2018 5:25

It couldn't be that big, considering this dude's gag reflex...

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