Sex, Neighbours and Intimacy: Jogging is dangerous

Jogging is dangerous

By jumpedjogger - 14/09/2011 08:34 - United States

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 615

You deserved it 3 770

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Same thing different taste

Jog on

By Anonymous - 06/10/2021 10:59

Today, my husband told me that the only reason he took up jogging 4 years ago was because my mother moved in next door to us and he knew it would kill my sex drive. We haven’t had sex in 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 009

You deserved it 727

By Caught - 11/11/2010 13:34 - United States

Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 684

You deserved it 43 190

Sort yourselves out

By Anonymous - 01/07/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 674

You deserved it 95

By Anonymous - 16/02/2012 03:59 - United States

Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 289

You deserved it 2 902

Breaking news

By Anonymous - 23/11/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was feeling motivated to improve my unhealthy miserable life and went for a jog. Halfway through, I tripped on my own shoelace and scared a couple walking their dog. According to my wife, it's already been gossiped about in our neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 74

By jitiizer - 19/09/2012 17:02 - Netherlands - Leeuwarden

Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 952

You deserved it 2 320

By katybaby - 09/12/2010 17:15 - United States

Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 360

You deserved it 11 703

By bet a woman would've been thanked - 07/05/2013 20:21 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 118

You deserved it 3 108

By Anonymous - 09/02/2015 14:53 - United States - Middleton

Today, I was chased out of my own house by my wife's lover's dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 922

You deserved it 3 366

By Anonymous - 26/08/2009 00:52 - Canada

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 707

You deserved it 3 658

kayladance101 13

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:06

Well if his wife wont have sex with him, maybe she'll do it with you! Give it a try :)

cooperd52 6

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:07

That's assault. Why dont you report him?

Comments

krackednyc 0

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:27

U should file charges and restraining order

FYLDeep 25

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:32

I'm assuming that he has no reason to blame you for his wife not wanting sex. If I'm wrong, then you left some pretty important information out of the story. I would suggest reporting the assault and possibly getting a restraining order.

rastafarhi 0

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:40

Jog a new route bro.

Enigmax2514 7

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:44

Call the cops genius

trellz17 19

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:46

Next time you see him say "of course she won't sleep with you cause she already had some of this" then jog home, I doubt he can keep up with you

leadman1989 15

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:48

That'll teach you! Running around here all fit and sexy. Making my fat bald lazy ass look bad. >:(

CryMoreFMLs 14

Thursday 15 September 2011 7:22

Yeah you tell him 21! Stand up for us heavy guys!

albow2dking007 14

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:56

I would shove a restraining order up his a**

instnt1nfction 17

Wednesday 14 September 2011 21:44

Up his ant

JokerJohn7 0

Thursday 15 September 2011 0:59

It's ace^

twisted54 1

Thursday 15 September 2011 9:09

I think it's arm...:)

albow2dking007 14

Thursday 15 September 2011 13:21

its probably ass...just sayin

Btreasure 8

Wednesday 14 September 2011 16:57

Your such a homewrecker. I'm kidding I just wanted to call someone a homewrecker. Maybe he should go jogging with you so his wife might have sex with him again

Juicy0023 0

Wednesday 14 September 2011 17:04

**** his wife for revenge

perdix 29

Wednesday 14 September 2011 17:07

You must be wearing your Richard Simmons short shorts. Fashion today dictates that men can only wear shorts ranging from Bermudas to culottes. When ladies see a man jogging by showing some manly thigh, and maybe a flash of buttock or scrotum, their desire for their husbands dries up.