Sex, Pranks and Intimacy: Keep us posted

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By suxx - 25/06/2011 08:39 - United States

Today, I walked around for hours with a Post-it on my back reading, "I JUST HAD SEX!" My boyfriend stuck it on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 769

You deserved it 8 228

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Same thing different taste

Gettin' some

By Username - 01/05/2011 08:20 - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 513

You deserved it 46 423

By rplovez - 05/09/2011 23:14 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 314

You deserved it 4 029

Go-faster stripes

By Anonymous - 25/08/2022 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We kept the lights on for a change and he asked me, "Babe, what's that on your tummy?" They're my stretch marks. Sex and body confidence ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 182

You deserved it 232

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 165

You deserved it 6 020

By besviken - 18/11/2012 22:53 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 477

You deserved it 6 335

Bored stiff

By RJB - 29/07/2011 02:48 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I got so bored, I made a "to do" list for the week in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 098

You deserved it 12 627

Stuck on you

By Anonymous - 10/02/2025 15:00 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I put on a new pair of jeans and went out. Halfway through my errands, I realized the long sticker with my size was still on the back. I walked around for quite a while advertising my embarrassing waist and leg measurements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 322

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 425

You deserved it 4 271

By Crashburn - 16/01/2012 11:09 - United Kingdom

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 878

You deserved it 15 392

You're welcome

By Anonymous - 04/06/2025 13:00 - United States - Lincoln

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he pulled up his pants and said, "There you go." FML

I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 107

mojojojo91 6

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:01

Did it feel so good?

FUUUandyourmom 16

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:00

What an amazing boyfriend you've got there!

Comments

CaramelRainbows 2

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:05

next time you should put a HUGE post it on his back that says "HELP ME IM A VIRGIN".

tjsomethin 9

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:05

Maybe they thought you were referring to the song?

chriskeroack1 5

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:06

seems like ur bf is a general

hateevryone 14

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:07

your boyfriend is dumb as hell

iAmScrubs 19

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:45

And how dumb is hell exactly?

taytoc 10

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:08

be should get one that says "and it felt so good"

DKParth13 5

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:09

At first by just reading "I JUST HAD SEX" I thought she was talking about the song!!

hahahahhaa 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 17:41

me too

HiccupAstrid 1

Sunday 26 June 2011 13:59

Lol I was listening to the song as I read this!

KennKenn 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:12

Boyfriend of the Year.

tettles 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:16

a woman let me put my penis inside her

lendalynn 5

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:17

hhahaha ur boyfriend is awesome

woahheylex 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:22

did you go to church after that?

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The Top

Today, in the morning, my wife and I were having hot but silent sex on my futon while our 3 year-old slept in his crib. It was going great until my turn to come when I released a loud, "AARRGHHHHHH". My son promptly got up, took one look at me and his mother's back, then promptly went back to sleep without a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 1 897

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 513

You deserved it 3 519

The Top

Today, my mom told me that I wasn't allowed rights until I was eighteen, or until I took on some duties. The rights include having or expressing ideals that don't match up with hers. She doesn't know what duties I should have. My options are to either take on nonexistent duties, or keep my mouth shut for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 207

Today, while out grocery shopping with my mother, she asked me to hold a large bag of rice for her. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd been absent-mindedly stroking it the whole time, just like when I pick up my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 472

You deserved it 9 360

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 774

You deserved it 2 594

Today, I realized I apologize too often as I said I was sorry to my boyfriend as he broke up with me. I apologized for being sad and making him feel bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 481

You deserved it 5 752

Today, after my husband applied for a VA loan so we could move out of our ridiculously overpriced apartment and into our first home as a mortgage would be significantly cheaper, we were denied. If we can afford $1400/month in rent, we surely can’t be trusted with $1000/month for a mortgage, right? FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 212

You deserved it 201

Today, at Burger King, I was coming back from break. A customer screamed at me because she ordered a double cheeseburger without pickles, and they were put on anyway. She threw it in my face. My face was covered in ketchup mustard and pickle. Did I mention I was on a break and had nothing to do with this? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 112