Sex, Weird, Frustration and Intimacy: Like a dream

Like a dream

By love and tolerape, apparently - 01/03/2015 19:24 - India - Jamshedpur

Today, after a 7-year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 166

You deserved it 8 415

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/02/2013 19:19 - Botswana - Francistown

Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 982

You deserved it 6 009

By L - 16/10/2012 22:59 - Norway - Trondheim

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 631

You deserved it 6 909

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 713

You deserved it 4 272

By margelover - 11/10/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 132

You deserved it 9 045

Bronies for life

By bestiality, not even once - 14/06/2013 22:29 - Ireland - Waterford

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 484

You deserved it 6 712

By Ryan - 11/06/2011 14:24 - United States

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 296

You deserved it 7 471

Freudian

By giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock - 19/12/2014 23:14 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 124

You deserved it 4 655

By bestiality? do I look like a pig? - 26/05/2013 20:50 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I borrowed my boyfriend's laptop. Out of curiosity, I clicked through the bookmarks in his web browser. One of them took me to a site dedicated to sex stories featuring characters from My Little Pony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 232

You deserved it 18 351

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 13:26 - United States - Manchester

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 336

You deserved it 4 027

By Anonymous - 25/06/2012 22:08 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 944

You deserved it 17 813

SkyGuy32 17

Monday 2 March 2015 0:03

Maybe you're just subconsciously a brony.

ZeroDying 11

Monday 2 March 2015 0:05

I had the same dream but with Elmo ...

Comments

ouijacorn 9

Tuesday 3 March 2015 0:14

It was RainbowDash, wasn't it? I always knew that bitch was shady.

Daevas 18

Tuesday 3 March 2015 0:41

Was it princess celestia? She does have an alter ego.. （；＿；）

queeenmik 8

Tuesday 3 March 2015 4:56

?? this brought me happiness tbh. dw you'll get laid soon man

edmunson 22

Tuesday 3 March 2015 7:28

SEVEN ******* YEARS? That is way more than a dry "spell"!

maSOkiSt 13

Tuesday 3 March 2015 15:46

Seriously. Seven years? I had a four month stint and that was intolerable.

kalbrek009 20

Tuesday 3 March 2015 17:38

But, bronies are just cloppers who are closeted...right? Lol, jk! Or am I jk?

WilliamMurderfac_fml 23

Wednesday 4 March 2015 0:42

Its not you, you just shared a dream with mike kroon

TonyTerrorNJ732 3

Wednesday 4 March 2015 6:21

Well that's a whole new meaning to "hung like a horse".

Wabba001 10

Thursday 5 March 2015 8:17

At least it wasn't... Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

KA1621 3

Thursday 5 March 2015 23:26

lol which one? haha and why?

Keywords

My ex Awkward Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Cold weather Annoying Snow Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 057

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

The Top

Today, like every other day, my older sister hates me, and I have no idea why. She refuses to speak to me and has never provided me with a reason why. She gets along great with my younger sister though and I get to see them having fun together in Facebook posts all the time. I'm heartbroken and she doesn't care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 111

Today, my boyfriend sent me a nude picture. I would have been fine with it if he hadn't taken it in his ex-girlfriend's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 426

You deserved it 4 764

Today, I got yelled at in a grocery store by a customer who recognized me from the pizza place where I work. Apparently, I forgot mushrooms on her pizza earlier this afternoon. I had the day off, but thanks for the verbal lashing, lady. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 788

You deserved it 1 887

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 968

You deserved it 2 057

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 175

You deserved it 6 587

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 925

You deserved it 7 087

Like a dream

Same thing different taste

Bronies for life

Freudian

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