Sex and Intimacy: Manly man - FML

Manly man

By thelistman - 13/11/2009 19:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend made me shave my chest. Afterwards, she said I looked like I was 12. She won't have sex with me until it grows back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 408

You deserved it 5 146

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Same thing different taste

Shaving!

By John Doe - 07/01/2020 05:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me that if I shaved, my penis might seem bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 066

You deserved it 468

By JasonX0656 - 29/01/2017 06:00 - United States - Kalamazoo

Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 716

You deserved it 1 579

Freaked out

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my shirt off, she saw my chest acne. She ran out of my house and hasn't spoken to me in 5 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 150

You deserved it 263

Cuties

By Anonymous - 07/12/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I shaved my penis and balls. When my girlfriend saw, she said, "You look like my little brother." He's 6 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 462

By Anonymous - 25/12/2010 21:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me the reason she asked me to shave my beard. When I go down on her shaved, it feels more like her ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 816

You deserved it 3 868

By Anonymous - 26/09/2010 09:26 - Vietnam

Today, I finally had the confidence to show my girlfriend my hairy chest/stomach. I'm very self conscious about it, and get embarrassed easily. She said I looked disgusting, called me Chewbacca and broke up with me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 309

You deserved it 7 157

Not that into you

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 12:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend won’t give me oral because she doesn't like pubes, so I trimmed them; she refused again because they felt prickly, so I waxed them. Now she says I look like a little boy. If she doesn’t want to suck cock, why won’t she just say so instead of hinting she might if I shaved? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 195

You deserved it 388

By Foxy0706 - 10/11/2015 19:27 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 168

You deserved it 2 417

What should I do?

By Anonymous - 08/12/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 319

You deserved it 586

By hairless - 30/07/2010 06:45 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 443

You deserved it 10 124

Next

Top comments

BlackScorpionAng 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:42

Your life is really ****** because you're pussy whipped. Your girlfriend "MADE" you shave your chest. I bet if you reach between your legs you wouldn't even feel your balls...you'd need to rummage threw her purse and find them to feel those babies now boy. And sadly, even after she "MADE" you preform for her, you still phailed... and she cut you off anyway. This is why your life is ******..it's not your naked chest, which no doubt she'll make fun of with her friends and probably her mother and then tell your friends about and never let you live down. You should reclaim your junk, pack you stuff and get the **** out before you're forced to wear her panties and bra for her amusement.

elannasdad 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:43

Do her from behind

Comments

hock 0

Sunday 9 October 2011 2:33

Today i lost my virginity to what I thought was girl at first was that after pulling down "his" pants he then yelled no I'm just a boy! FML!!

xsarax_fml 10

Sunday 6 January 2013 1:22

i hate to say this but it's so unattractive when men are whipped by their girlfriends... if she doesn't like chest hair boo hoo don't change who you are for her!

allliseee 8

Wednesday 6 November 2013 1:40

Like she always shaves everything..

martin8337 35

Wednesday 23 July 2014 23:29

Then go have sex with someone else.

EuroAegis 11

Sunday 2 November 2014 20:43

That's how girls work

fantasyworld 37

Friday 1 May 2015 4:21

She shouldn't be making you do anything.

OneOnJuanAction 22

Thursday 12 May 2016 2:51

She made you shave your chest, now you make her have sex with you.

Keywords

Christmas Love Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family

The Top

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 191

You deserved it 515

Today, my dad has been faking social anxiety to make me feel like there's something wrong with me. How do I know? Because I actually have social anxiety, and he not only shows no symptoms of it, but he also has a lot of misconceptions about it that he would know are false if he actually did have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 180

The Top

Today, after eating out with my boyfriend, we went for a drive, but ended up getting into an argument. I reached back to grab my bag and storm out of the car. He thought I was trying to take the restaurant's doggy bag and lunged at me. My boyfriend would rather save chicken than our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 444

You deserved it 6 568

Today, at the library, somebody left themselves logged in to Facebook on a public computer after they had left. Trying to teach them a lesson, I updated their Facebook status to something outrageous. That's when they came back to the computer after getting something from the printer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 575

You deserved it 68 099

Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read, "My mom's a total pedo," after which she mentioned the talk. Her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 508

You deserved it 6 348

Today, I was at work handling the cash register. It wasn't working correctly, so I apologized to the woman I was waiting on for the delay and explained, "The cash register's being a little retarded today." Then I noticed her clearly "special" adult son standing behind her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 241

You deserved it 69 043

Today, whilst in a dressing room trying on some new clothes, I experienced the sheer terror of having someone fling a pair of dirty panties over the stall wall only to make off with some stolen ones, whilst you're still standing there in shock staring at another woman's dirty underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 057

You deserved it 1 282

Today, my house got its annual visit from a cat that lives down the street. My dogs did nothing to chase it away, and it marked its territory. I have a very sensitive nose, but I can't find where the smell is coming from for the life of me. I am also highly susceptible to migraines, and cat piss triggers them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 905